Category Archives: Movie Reviews

Today on Radio Sex: Let’s Get Physical (1983)

Let-s-Get-PhysicalToday on Radio Sex XM103 at 2:40 PM Eastern-ish, we’ll be talking about Bob Chinn‘s 1983 feature, Let’s Get Physical, written by and starring one of today’s guests, Hyapatia Lee.

The movie is simple – Hyapatia Lee and Paul Thomas are married.  PT is a renowned ballet dancer, and Hyapatia is a jazz/rock dancer.

The movie opens with PT leaving the ballet stage, roses in hand.  He goes back to his dressing room where Hyapatia awaits, and he proposes a little hanky panky, but she demurs, worried there are too many people around.

So a gaggle of dancers come in to pay their respects, and one, Martina, stays behind and lets PT fuck her instead.  It’s a pretty quick shag, a blowjob and a missionary fuck where PT cums on her bush.  Unfortunately, Hyapatia sees the tryst and cries on the ride all the way home… well, they never make it home because her bawling distracts PT and he drives their car off a cliff, crippling him and ending his dancing career.

There’s tension at home since he blames Hyapatia for the accident and he knows he can never turn her into a ballerina, which suits her fine, since she’s a rock/jazz dancer!  He was hoping to give her name to a theatrical producer as a choreographer, but he’s not sure she can do it since she’s not a ballerina.

Cut to the dance studio and Hyapatia shows off her talents as a dancer (and I assume choreographer) with a 5 minute routine to something that sounds eerily like Michael Jackson’s “Beat It.”

She goes back home and tried to make love with PT, but he lost the “ability to make love when I lost my ability to dance.”  Welcome to the pity party, Hyapatia!!

She returns to the studio to teach novice ballerina, Shanna McCullough.  Shanna has always been one of my favorites, and I came to know her a little later in her career.  This is her at the very beginning, 23 years old, and she looks awesome in her leotard, stretching on the barre.

Of course, we need to learn the dance of love, and she an Hyapatia do a little floor dancing and rug munching; but what do you know — PT’s cock gets hard watching his wife and her student roll around the dance floor in their birthday suits.  (I mean, who wouldn’t, really….).

Later on, at home, PT mentions to Hyapatia that he watched her “lesson” and it got him rock hard – the first time since the accident.  He sets up a meeting with Shanna at the studio and later invites her over for dinner.  They retire to the bedroom so he can ostensibly look at Shanna’s “form” but it’s all just pretense for fucking someone other than his wife.  There’s some good tandem cocksucking, but he ends up fucking Shanna and ignoring Hyapatia who looks forlornly at the ceiling while her voiceover laments that she’s out in the cold while he fucks his “prima ballerina.”  All Hyapatia wants is to be with her husband, and all he wants is to be with a ballerina.

She slips into a fantasy sequence , a nice enough early 80s piano ballad (“Ballerina Dance For Me”) plays and PT is at a piano miming to it and she’s topless next to him, but then Shanna comes in and stays with PT, and this is the weirdest most bummer fantasy ever… until she dances into the studio and into the arms of Mike Horner and they hump, er, make love, on a mattress on the floor.  Lots of kissing and satisfying the female needs.  He nails her in missionary then she does her best to deep throat him and she jerks a HUGE cumshot out of him which manages to miss her face, but its am impressive geyser nonetheless, and she cleans off his cock when he’s done and they kiss and transition back to her own real hell of PT fucking Shanna sidesaddle and she jerks him off on her bush.

Another stellar performance by the ballet troupe – Mike HornerShanna McCullough, Erica Boyer and Francois – and they all congratulate each other in the dressing room. Hyapatia gives them all a hug and then PT comes in and tells them they were better than he ever expected (gee, thanks, PT) and they should get out to meet the scouts from the NYC Ballet.  PT then kisses Hyapatia’s ass a little and complements her choreography.  PT suggests they bang in the dressing room, and this time, she says she’d love to!  Cue the “Beat It-esque” music and she blows him, and afterwards he takes her doggy style during which we’re to believe he cums inside her.  (They are married after all…)

Now Francois is doing some rock dance in the studio and Erica Boyer stumbles onto him and is amazed that he can dance in such a modern way.  And then he shows her how he can dance the dance as old as time.  She licks her way down his chest and swallows his dick until he cums all over her face… but out boy “has one more in him” and fucks her on the floor , blowing a second wad on her belly.  Nicely done, sir!

There’s a party for Shanna and Mike who have earned spots in the NYC Ballet.  Shanna is now mooneyed for Mike and they leave for NYC.  PT then tells Hyapatia that she got the choreographer gig and they all live happily ever after.

Bob Chinn makes enjoyable movies.  This is what we would today call “A Couples Film” as it’s very much told from a woman’s point of view; a woman who is not happy about her wayward husband, but sticks by him in an attempt to work it out… or maybe just to get choreography job.. I’m not quite sure. :-)

Imperator gave this movie a 2.45 in this very brief review:

This one has a stellar cast indeed: Hyapatia Lee (woof), Shanna McCullough(hooowwwwwl), Erica Boyer, Paul Thomas and Mike Horner. It is a cute effort but a bit too much concerned with the weak plot, with the result that the sex scenes are not what they could well be. The Imperial verdict is: waste of resources. Neither Hyapatia, nor Shanna are used well; the threesome with PT is particularly disappointing. Still, it is a very decent flick, certainly superior to what we get nowadays (I must have said this phrase five times in this post :-) Must be true!).

Rating: 2.45

I think it’s a bit better than his rating of  “rent only if you are an ardent fan of the particular star/genre featured” and would put it in the “good rental” category.  At 78 minutes long, if you’re planning on watching the whole thing you’re going to want to go for the 2 day rental over at Adult DVD Empire which will only set you back $4 as opposed to paying per minute which will set you back around $6.

This is one to watch with your partner who isn’t sure about porn; it’s nice and easy, nothing crazy; all the performers are attractive and not creepy, it’s competently made… it holds up as a good example of early 80s adult filmmaking.

Today on Radio Sex: Sex Secrets of a Mistress (1996)

48119Due to popular demand on Twitter, I’m going to be talking to Christy and Ginger on Radio Sex’ YouPorn show (XM 103, at 2:40ish eastern) about Christy’s 1996 movie, Sex Secrets of a Mistress, which features a scorching scene between her and Mark Davis.

The plot is simple enough, Mark is married to Jill Kelly who has been giving him the cold shoulder.

At work, he meets up with perfume salesperson Christy, and there’s an attraction there; one he might act upon.  They agree to have lunch the next week.

Mark goes to meet Christy for lunch, and at the next table, Channone and Vince Vouyer are drinking their water… but Mark’s mind wanders, and suddenly they’re fucking on the table.  The scene begins with some overbearing music, then it ends so we just get natural sound, and then it ends with music again, but not as overbearing.    It’s a pretty low-key scene until Vince shoves himself up her bum and cums on her ass.

Christy shows up for lunch, and Mark tells us that they continued their discussion in his office, but the pictures show her going down on him in an elevator.  He drags Christy by the arm thru his outer office (past startled secretary, Lana Sands) and Christy is back on her knees with his manhood in her mouth. He grabs her ears quite a bit (dude, she knows what to do!) and finally jerks off onto her tits.

Jill drops by Mark’s office, hoping to grab lunch, but a well timed phone call from Christy sends Jill away — but only to listen from outside Mark’s door.  Jill asks Lana if Mark is having an affair, and Lana does her best to keep his secret; but her best is not very good.

Christy gives Mark some phone sex, where she describes what she would do to Mark’s wife… and we dissolve to see what she’s describing!

It’s a pretty straight ahead rooftop g/g scene with a clear pink double dong dildo that they spend a lot of time fellating until Jill starts using it on Christy, who rides the thing like a prize bronco.  They intertwine a bit more and the scene concludes.

Mark comes out of his office looking for Jill (who is long gone) and he goes home to dinner, but the atmosphere is chilly, and he’s not sure if Jill bought the “I have a meeting” story, and didn’t interpret it as “I have to slam my mistress.”

Thus starts a landmark Christy scene.  There’s a ton of kissing and Mark spends a lot of time giving her oral pleasure which brings her to climax.  There’s a great position after Christy has blown Mark where he holds her up, his face in her crotch and her feet are on her shoulders.  I can’t imagine it was a super comfortable position with all the cantilevering, but it looked super hot.

There’s some great overhead shots where he’s fucking Christy (with a condom) and she’s lying back on the bed and it really shows off her tanned, toned physique and her most famous attributes (her boobs, for those not following along…).  Finally, Mark pulls out and cums on her tits, but Christy does something uncharacteristic – she sticks her tongue out in an effort to catch his cum.  She succeeds in catching a drop or two and then licks some more off her tits.  Mark then dives in and kisses the cum off her, so YMMV if that’s a turn on or a turn off.

This is quite a long way from The Night of Loving Dangerously where Jamie Gillis managed to turn her off facials for most of her career.

The only complaint about this scene is that it was cut as much as it was for the DVD (and by extension, VOD) release.  You might still be able to find the VHS version floating around some of the more grey areas of the internet…

The scene ends with Christy telling Mark that Jill is hosting a launch party at his house, like she does for all his clients.  This puts Christy, Jill and Mark in the same room, and Mark can’t handle it.  He’s got sex on the brain, so he fantasizes that his secretary, Lana Sands, gets banged (with a great facial) by Magnum D.

As Mark is talking to Christy and another guy, he sees Jill out of the corner of his eye (in a KILLER red dress) and can’t believe how hot she is, and how much he loves his wife.  They start to go at it right on the staircase.  (This, it should be noted, is also pre-surgery Jill Kelly.)  They work their way around a few positions on the stairs, with a good amount of time with her on her knees coming down their stairs, which puts her backend at such an angle that Mark can just piledrive her, and her moans get VERY gutteral during this bit.  Finally, she spins over, and Mark cums on her belly up to her tits.

Mark then tells us that after that night he never saw Christy again.  He feels he helped him save his marriage. He opines that the only thing worse than “telling someone your sex secrets, is not telling them at all.”

Someone should let me know how that works out for them…

Overall, this movie took itself too seriously in the story department, but it made up for it with some fantastic, career-defining work from Christy and Mark.

You could skip the talking parts, the Channone and the Lana Sands scenes, and still have a pretty good night…

 

Today on Radio Sex: Crime and Passion (2002)

crimeandpassionToday (2:40ish Eastern) on Radio Sex XM103’s YouPornChristy and Ginger welcome Nick Manning onto the show, so I figured I’d take a look at one of Nick’s earlier films, Veronica Hart’s Crime and Passion from 2002, co-starring our own Ginger Lynn.

[PLOT SPOILERS AHEAD. I WISH I THOUGHT THE PLOT WAS BETTER SO I WOULD MIND SPOILING IT.]

Ashlyn Gere is plagued by dreams.  She’s a cop, and she’s having a hard time on the job because her fellow officers (Tyce BuneDale DaBone) don’t respect her.  After a long day, she goes home to find a mysterious VHS tape waiting for her.  She pops it in and she watches Kylie Ireland have mainstream-kinky (which is to say not very kinky – some toe sucking, slight female domination) with a hooded Hershel Savage.  We’re not sure if we’re supposed to know it’s Herschel or not, but if you’re even slightly familiar with his middle-aged physique, you’d make the connection.  The sex between the two is pretty hot ending with a pretty great facial.

The next day, she goes out for coffee with Nick Manning who compliements her on her looks and her ability as a cop, which softens her up.  The TV shows a news reporter, Kelly Nichols, in front of a strip club, reporting on the murder of a dancer, who happens to be Kylie Ireland.

Ashlyn storms into Herschel’s office demanding to work the case — Kylie was HER FRIEND! — but Herschel lets her know it’s not even being worked out of their precinct.  She tries to sweet talk him, but he gets angry, asking why she goes all hot and cold… first they’re lovers, then they’re not… and after Ginger drops some papers off, Ashlyln’s jealous side rears itself.

Cut to Ashlyn in bed, dreaming about Kylie.  She wakes up and stumbles outside for a smoke when she sees Alex Foxe and Steven St. Croix getting it on in a convertible.  Alex is in a red leather bikini and is very vocal about how good things feel.  She rides St. Croix reverse cowgirl and then they move into doggie.  Finally, they end up in mish across the front seat and Steve pulls out and shoots a load the length of her body hitting her right on the cheek.  Excellent aim, sir! (Even if the cumshot is looped.)

The next day, Ashlyn asks Nick if he’d help her run down a lead on Kylie’s case.  Nick is very charming and they head out to the strip club.  They strong arm the day manager who thinks he recognizes Ashlyn, and gives up the name of a dancer Kylie hung around with, some girl named Gina.  Ashyln wants to go back to the club that night, but Nick is busy working another case involving credit card fraud.

Cut to that night, and Mark Davis is throwing money at Wanda Curtis who takes him into the back.  He asks that his money gets him “anything” and she purrs that he’s so sweet, but when he tries to kiss her, she pulls away and redirects him to the couch. Nice play!  She climbs on top of him and he sucks her tits for a bit before she moves down for the blowjob.  Gina’s stage set is over, Alex takes her place, and Gina heads backstage and jumps in on Wanda’s action.  Mark nails Gina in a standing doggie that really shows off how rock hard her physique is. Mark cums on both their faces, and before they get a chance to enjoy their cummy kisses, Mark swoops in and kisses both of them very deeply.  Great cumshot marred by the interruption.

Next up, Ashlyn is in the shower and is surprised by Herschel who let himself in.  Ashlyn kisses him and he decides to bug out.  He’s playing some mind games, and she’s ALL KINDS of upset by it.  There’s a knock on the door and she expects it to be Herschel, but it’s Nick.  His credit card fraud case wrapped up and he was in the neighborhood.  She’s not sure what do do — watch TV? — but they end up making out and he nails her hard on the living room couch.  They work up a pretty good sweat, and he cums on her face and chest.  Sadly, no trademark “DROPPING LOADS!” here…

They snuggle, but she’s plagued by more dreams, and we flashback to Ashlyn being really cunty to Herschel while he’s sucking her toes.  She’s fully clothed, bitching him out and Kylie enters the room.  Ashlyn tells him how to fuck Kylie. Kylie has some sparkly eyelid-liner on.  Herschel cums on her tits.

Meanwhile, back at the station, Ashlyn hasn’t shown up for work.  Herschel calls Nick into his office and explains (in a pure contrivance that doesn’t make any real sense) that he Tyce Bune are going to visit the club to check on the dancer named Gina.  Nick asks to tag along, but Herschel makes him promise to stay in the car.

Sindee Coxx shows the undercovers to a table where they ask for a private dance with Gina.  Sindee explains that Gina only works with Wanda, and leads Herschel in the back to wait.  The disbelief the plot asks us to suspend at this point is ludicrous. [I can’t take it — SPOILER ALERT! — Gina is Ashlyn.  DOUBLE LIFE IN THE SKY!] So for the movie to ask me to believe that Herschel wouldn’t recognize his ex-girlfriend when she’s wearing a wig and Lennon sunglasses is insane.  Tyce finds his way back and Ashlyn goes to work on him while Wanda fucks (anally too!) and sucks Herschel. Gina rides Tyce Reverse Cowgirl for a long time and then the guys cums on their tits.

Post-coitus, Herschel puts it together and rips Gina’s wig off.  She has what could best be called a “disassociative event” and completely breaks down.  Nick watches as Ashlyn is dragged out of the club and can’t wrap his head around what is going on.  All of this drama gives Ashlyn a chance to show off her ACT-ING! skills with lots of crazy yelling and split personalities.  She’s taken in for observation and questioning by a doctor, Veronica Hart, who eventually coaxes a confession out of her.

Ginger delivers the tape that started this whole mess back to Herschel and he is happy he closed the case, but at what price?  Fucking Ginger is his reward, tho, and fuck they do.  They have a really great scene with moments of awesome intensity. They play off each other very well.  It ends with Herschel cumming on each of Ginger’s tits.

AVN gave this movie a 4 1/2 A rating, which is generous.  The review was breathless in its complimenting the plot, which wasn’t any kind of great whodunit.  The sex in the movie is solid and for brief moments transcends into something resembling a connection a few times, and the cumshots are all generally good.  But the plot is overwrought.  Clearly a vehicle for Ashlyn to chew some scenery, but I think Nick really holds his own here.

My exposure to Nick has always been in gonzo titles where DROPPING LOADS! is acceptable, and it was interesting to see him here without those trappings.

Overall, I”m kind of meh on the movie, but it could be due to the fact that I’m not in a great mood and I’ve had a few beers, but I don’t think so… it was just too serious for itself.

I’ll leave you with this: he’s been on Stern a few times, and this is a pretty great segment where Howard plays various clips form his films and Nick comments on them

Today on Radio Sex: Pussyman 6 (1994)

Pussyman6 Cover via HotMoviesToday (2:40ish Eastern) on Radio Sex XM103’s YouPorn, Christy and Ginger welcome the Pussyman himself, David Christopher onto the show, so we’re going to talk about Pussyman 6, a favorite of mine, that I haven’t seen since I first reviewed it back in 1994.

The first five or so minutes of the movie are a recap of action from Pussyman 5, specifically scenes 4, 5, 8 and 11. which sets up the premise: Pussyman and his partner, Wil Divide, are in a mansion watching closed circuit TVs of folks having sex. Leena is their accomplice and helps facilitate the sex.

Leena was a hardbodied Italian girl with enhanced tits (I say enhanced because they looked good and weren’t quite too big for her frame) and the reason I got this movie in the first place.  Now, 19 years later, I’m happy to see Leena again along with some old favorites like Kaitlyn AshleyKrysti LynnSummer Knight and current favorite as well, Rebecca Bardoux.

A staple of the series was the pussy clip, which was a bent piece of metal that were wrapped around the pussy lips.  Virtually everyone wears one in the movie.

First scene is Rebecca Bardoux and Krysti Lynn (RIP) getting it on in a pool.  Both girls are wearing sunglasses (Lennon specs for Rebecca, classic mock RayBans for Krysti) and they spend some time kissing and frolicing before beckoning Alex Sanders and having him get in the pool to eat Krysti’s ass.  Rebecca doesn’t want to be left out, to Alex eats her ass too, and Krysti — with a devilish grin — sucks on Rebecca’s toes; which Rebecca seems to like very much.  Krysti gets some asslicks in too, before the girls turn around to focus on Alex’ talents. They take turns blowing him and then Krysti climbs on Alex’ face, leaving his cock to Rebecca.  Krysti cums a bit before sliding back into the pool and having Alex take her doggie style. Then it’s Rebecca’s turn for some doggie style loving, and at the end Alex pulls out and cums on Krysti’s face.

Cut to Gerry Pike and (a young) Kyle Stone waiting for Jeannie Pepper.  She finally shows up in a silver dress and showing off her pussyclip. She then blows Gerry, paying attention to his balls, and playing to Pussyman’s camera.  It’s a little weird cutting away to Pussyman and Wil just sitting gazing at a TV every so often.  Gerry moves to fucking Jeannie while she blows Kyle.  She then lowers herself reverse cowgirl onto Gerry while telling Kyle to “suck on these big brown titties!” Gerry pulls out after a short while and cums on her face.   (Kyle vanished by this point; I don’t he ever got to fuck her…)

leena1Next up, Leena is rallying Rebecca BardouxKrysti Lynn and newcomer to the group Kaitlyn Ashley to play to the camea while in assless stockings and pussyclips. The four girls all look amazing here, which is good since there is a lot of posing and not a lot of sexual heat or interaction.  They tease Pussyman’s camera, and walk over it when they exit the scene. Kaitlyn plays with herself a little before the scene ends.

We move outside for some tease shots of Isis Nile who briefly plays with herself in extreme closeup.

Back in a bedroom, Kaitlyn is nude and showing off her enhanced breasts and playing with herself.  Kaitlyn could play glamour and trailer trash equally well, and she’s all glammed up for us.  Also masturbating in the same vicinity is Barbara Doll. The girls find each other and play a bit, but are interrupted by Steve Drake who is stunned that they don’t need a guy’s talents to keep them happy; but they oblige him to maintain his fragile male ego.  (Maybe I’m projecting.) Steve and Kaitlyn each take a tit of Barbara’s in their mouths.  Kaitlyn has some serious meat curtains and she’s not afraid to show them off. The two girls then move to blowing Steve; Barbara sucking while Kaitlyn jerks. They girls kiss a lot and they keep it up as Kaitlyn rides Steve RC.  Barbara helps keep Kaitlyn spread for the camera. The girls find themselves in a 69 with Barbara on top while Steve fucks her doggie.  Kaitlyn’s tongue divides its time between Barbara’s quim and Steve’s balls.  Finally, Steve pulls out and drops a huge load into Kaitlyn’s mouth which she struggles to push out to prevent it from choking her.  Hot stuff.

Leena is with Pussyman and Wil and masturbating at the hotness that she sees, but stops and tells them to focus on the monitors.

leena2

She enters a kitchen in a white leotard which really shows off her curves and proceeds to tease the hell out of Nick East.  She plays with herself (DP!) using some dildos and looks at Pussyman’s camera, teasing them as well. She masturbates on a glasstop table and the action is captured up thru the table VERY effectively. Nick rips the letard off of her.  She sits on a chair and eases a dildo up her ass as Nick fucks her.  They move to standing doggie, and the dildo stays in her ass. Finally, Nick cums, but something seems botched because we don’t see anything.  He pulls out, she takes him into her mouth as fast as she can, and ostensibly swallows, but we don’t see any real proof.  However, the rest of the scene leading up to this was so smoking, we can forgive it.

For the last scene, Isis is in front of Pussyman, Wil and Steve, and they’re all agog over Leena’s show.  Suddenly, Summer Knight and Alicia Rio bust in wearing day-glo neon mini-dresses apologizing  for losing Pussyman’s address and dismayed that they thought they were the stars of the series.   They offer to put on a show, and the guys agree.  Summer and Alicia focus on each other for awhile and then Isis comes over and joins in.  There’s a lot of looking at the camera in this scene, and Alicia wears a day-glo pink strap on that matched her dress and bangs everyone.

The guys leave the house and leave Leena standing on the doorstep tapping her pussy through her miniskirt.  They get into a waiting limo and comment on the festivities — that they need a rest since they were exposed to so much pussy… so much so that they didn’t notice Erica Bee in the limo, wantonly running herself through her panties… and prompting a NOOOOOOOO! as we fade to the credits.

Wowie, kazowie.  This was a solid movie if there ever was one.  All the girls in it looked GREAT.  All the girls were into their scenes and didn’t phone anything in.  Leena looked great throughout, but really knocked it out of the park in the white body stocking.

Even though the facial Leena was supposed to get is only implied, I still iked the hell out of her scene with Nick East. The energy levels in all the scenes is also excellent, so I say this one is a 3.40 an excellent rental.

This movie is certainly worth a look.  It’s available on VOD.

19 years later, it still holds up.  The white bodystocking brought back some fond memories. :-)

SASHA STRANGE

Last week, Christy asked me to look her up Sasha since she has recently reappeared on Twitter. She and Christy had two scenes together, the classic with Peter North in Hot In The City; and a g/g in Play Christy For Me.

The good folks over at Vintage Erotica Forum also has a thread dedicated to her.

 

Today on Radio Sex: Deep Inside Annie Sprinkle (1981)

Deep Inside Annie SprinkleToday around 2:40pm Eastern on Radio Sex (SiriusXM 103) You Porn, I’ll be talking with Ginger and Christy about Joe Sarno’s 1981 classic, Deep Inside Annie Sprinkle, in honor of their guest, Annie Sprinkle.

DIAS is the fourth movie in Evart’s star based series, coming after Jennifer Welles, Gloria Leonard and Seka but predating Little Oral Annie and Angel Cash’s entries in the series.

The movie opens up with Annie, braless, looking gorgeous in a low cut outfit sitting in front of a piano where she shares with us some family photos and gives us a little bit of her history.  She confesses she lost her virginity somewhere between 16 and 17 and that her family knows what she does for a living in the sex trade and they try to be understanding.  However, all talk and no play makes us all a bit restless, so Annie introduces us to David Messa (as Bobby Soccie) and Frank Vickers (as Roger Ram) as a couple of hunks she wants to play with.

She shows off some very impressive deep throating skills, taking her partners balls deep down her throat before jerking them off to completion.

Next up, she’s standing in lingerie with the cups of the bra cut out, so her pendulous breasts are on display, and she asks the silly question “Do you like big tits?”  (If we didn’t, we’d be watching one of the Itty Bitty Titty movies…) Sassy is the lucky gal who gets to make love to those breasts, and she spends a good deal of time worshiping them until Annie returns the favor.  There’s lot of nipple-on-nipple action, lovingly captured.

Eventually, Annie does make her way downtown, eating Sassy out to orgasm and then a little nipple-on-pussy action as well.  We’re really highlighting her breasts in this sequence.  Annie looks back at the camera and mentions that she’s like to have a nice hard prick to fuck her between her tits, and VOILA!  there’s Ron Jeremy!  (This is 1981 Ron, so he’s still hairy, but very much in shape and without the trademark afro.)

So, while Ron titfucks Annie, Sassy looks on, massaging her own mammaries until Ron straddles Annie’s tits and then Sassy goes in and eats her out and Ron cums on Annie’s face.

Next, Annie is in a leather get-up with her boobs swing free as she plays pool.   This next segment is about ass-play, and in case you wondered why Annie keeps her middle fingernail cut short, this is where you find out. Marc Valentine is ass up on a bed, and Annie climbs up on top and slobbers over his butt a bit before sliding her finger up his bum.  She mentions that her ass is sensitive too, so Marc works his ring finger up there, eventually working his middle finger in her quim.  This doesn’t last very long before a long, thin buttplug comes out and he works the plug up her butt.  Her hips buck and fight until he slides his cock up there.  It’s not very long before he pulls out and cums on her ass.

Next up, Annie is in a yellow bustier with her breasts unable to be constrained so her nipples are sticking out, and she explains that sometimes her pussy, when it is very aroused, likes to squirt hot liquid out.  Mal O’Ree has been eating her out for an hour or so, she claims, and her pussy is VERY aroused. She squirts on him, but then it turns to pee and she pees on him.  She puts her hand down to catch some and lets the residue drip into her mouth.  They move into 69 with her on top and he works a finger in her ass and her pussy as she swallows him down to the root.  She pees some more into his mouth.  (This footage is all available on the 2010 DVD re-release; NOT on the   initial DVD release.)  She climbs off him, they make out a bit, and she straddles his cock, peeing more as he tries to slide inside her.  He’s pretty soft at this point, so it takes some effort getting him up in her business.   Finally, he jerks himself off as she pees on him a little more.

Deep Inside Annie Sprinkle Daisy ChainNext up is the centerpiece of the movie, a 7 girl orgy.  Heather YoungBarbara MillerJudy BilodeauDiana May (as Lee Starr)Lisa B. (as Lisa Be) and Sheisha Jones.  The girls are all over each other, laying across one another, kissing, suckling, eating.  It culminates in a big daisy chain. The girls looks all scream SEVENTIES (even tho it was 1981, we’re still in the late 70s, lookwise).  Sarno does an excellent job of capturing a wide variety of actions.

Next up, Annie masturbates for us, in an effort for us to get closer to her.  She talks dirty throughout. She pulls out a precursor to the magic wand and just gives herself over to the pleasure.

The OrleansCut to NYC – the Orleans Off-Broadway Theatre on 47th Street, west of Broadway, across from the Hotel Edison where it’s showing a festival of Annie’s movies.  She tells us that sometimes she likes to go into a theatre that’s showing her movies and fuck anything that moves.  She sidles up to porn’s grandpa Jack Teague and blows him to completion while Mike Feline eats her out from behind.  Then she blows Mike and he cums on her.  She also fucks Michael Gaunt for good measure.

She’s in a photo studio next, with hot spandex pants and a Partner t-shirt (Partner was a magazine of the time) and we meet Buddy Hatton who is watching his lady friend Bunny Hatton pose on a seamless for Annie’s camera.  Bunny has a Sarah Shevon / Sovereign Syre vibe.  Annie needs to get some split beaver shots, but Bunny’s labia aren’t behaving, so she dives in to help open her up, and eventually moves to some beads while Buddy decides to get in on the action, and puts his dick in the general direction of Bunny’s mouth.  Annie strips down  and gets fucked, then she and Bunny go into a 69 and Bunny gets fucked doggie style while Annie tries to keep her nose out of harm’s way, pulling Buddy’s cock out for some sucking every so often.  Buddy finally pulls himself out of Bunny and cums on Annie’s face.  Annie deep throats him a little for good measure.

Finally, we see Annie on a rooftop overlooking Manhattan and she confesses sometimes she just needs to get fucked by a guy she likes.  So, she goes home, plays the piano a little, and tells us about how she likes to make “old fashioned love” and her meeting Ron Hudd inspired these feelings.

He eats her out, she sucks him off with a lot of spit and he bones her.  They kiss some throughout, but she does slip a finger up in her pussy as he’s fucking her  (how old fashioned!) and it ends with him pulling out and jerking himself off onto her garter belt.

We see Annie walking along The River and she tells us she hopes she made us feel special and good.  She blows us a kiss and walks away.

WOW WOW WOW.

Annie has become so much of a feminist icon in her later life and career that it’s easy to forget how fucking hot she was in the prime of her career.  This movie just oozes sex and is, IMHO,  required viewing.  The costumes and hairstyles aren’t completely distracting.  Annie looks great naked.  Her tits are really perfect and they’re not ignored in the slightest.

The performers are all shown off very well.  Sarno knew what he was doing.

Over at videotramp.com, DirtyMovieDevotee really sums it up perfectly: “Truth be told, there are no dull moments here and this has as much to do with Annie’s powerful and ingratiating personality as with the intimate imagination on display. Her legion of fans will want to own their very own copy. If you’re not among them, you may actually find yourself walking away as one. In that case, poetic justice has been served.”

Indeed.  On the Imperial Scale, this is a 3.95 out of 4.  (The urinating may not be every one’s cup of tea, and a few of the dicks could have been harder…)