Category: News

The 2015 Spank Bank Awards Nominations Are Here!

 

THE SPANK BANK AWARDS

Writer Gabriel Lan, back when he was at Fox Magazine, founded the Spank Bank Awards, an irreverent group of categories meant to honor the gals (and guys) who helped us make many deposits into our own personal Spank Bank over the past year.

When Gabriel joined our team, he brought the awards with him, so we’re happy to announce The 2015 Spank Bank Awards Nominees.

The most nominated star is Casey Calvert with 15 noms. Close on her heels is Carter Cruise with 14. Trailing close behind with 12 noms each are Jennifer White, Chanel Preston, Adriana Chechik, Anikka Albrite, Maddy O’Reilly and Penny Pax. Rounding out the Top 10 with 11 noms each are Veruca James, Bonnie Rotten and Ash Hollywood.

Winners will be announced as soon as we wring every last piece of social media traffic out of this… so in about a week or so. :-)

Follow @iafdcom and @gabriel_lan on Twitter for details and to get the heads up on the big reveal.  Use the hashtag #spankbank15

Most Spanked To Girl of the Year

Dirty Little Slut of the Year

Ho Holes of the Year

America’s Porn Sweetheart

Asshole of the Year

Bad Ass Brunette of the Year

BBC Slut of the Year

Best “Come Fuck Me” Eyes

Best “O” Face

Best All Around Ho

Best Body

Best Hands (aka Puppeteer of the Year)

Best High Speed DSL (Dick Sucking Lips)

Best Legs

Best Smile

Best Unborn Baby Swallower

Best Vocals (While Being Railed)

Blonde Bombshell of the Year

Boobalicious Babe of the Year

Breakthrough Star of the Year

Cock Sucking Whore of the Year

Cum Dumpster of the Year

Cumback of the Year

Dick of the Year

DP Diva of the Year

Fetish Floozie of the Year

Fucking Nerd of the Year

Fun Sized Fuck Bunny

Gang Banged Slut of the Year

Hardest Working Ho in Ho Biz

Imported Whore of the Year

Life Sized Human Hand Puppet

Masturbator of the Year

Mattress Actress of the Year

Most Adorable Slut

Most Beautiful Whore

Most Magnificent MILF

Most Photogenic Slut

Most Underrated Whore

Most Voluptuous Vixen

Newcummer of the Year

Porn’s Next “It” Girl

Prettiest Girl In Porn

Pussy Eating Princess of the Year

Pussy of the Year

Red Haired Harlot of the Year

Sexiest Inked Slut

Sexiest Woman Alive

Super Squirter of the Year

The Girl Next Door … Only Better

The Total Package

Tweeting Twat of the Year

Two Hot Dogs in a Hallway

Wet Dream Girl

This Ain’t Not The View XXX – A New Podcast

ThisAintNotTheViewXXX_1400px

So, Rog of RogReviews.com, Dr. Chauntelle of ChauntelleTibbals.com and myself have joined forces and are going to throw our hat into the podcasting ring, with a casual chat about the industry.  We’re calling the new venture This Ain’t Not The View XXX and we’re hoping to have other people sit in on future installments.  We took some inspiration from This Week in Tech by recording our first episode in person at a trade show… our next episode will be recorded remotely via Skype and the plan it to be recording new episodes biweekly.

The show will live at ThisAintNotTheViewXXX.com

We hope you enjoy the episode.

Congrats to the XBiz Award Winners!

2Well, we’re a little sad. Another year goes by, and it’s merely an honor to be nominated… FreeOnes took the Adult Site of the Year: Fan Site award for the whatever year running (but who’s counting?). Along with them, a bunch of other people won awards, here they are. It’s almost 4 AM on the East Coast, so I’m calling it a night with only the most minimal data analysis…

On the performer side, the big winners were Carter Cruise and James Deen who both won 3 awards.

The big winner was Eli Cross’ Wetwork (2014) which won SEVEN awards; Not Jersey Boys XXX: A Porn Musical (2014) and Second Chances (2014) were tied for second-most honored with 4 wins apiece.

So, here’s the breakdown:

All-Black Release of the Year

All-Girl Release of the Year

All-Sex Release of the Year

Amateur Release of the Year

Asian-Themed Release of the Year

BDSM Release of the Year

Best Actor – Couples-Themed Release

Best Actor – Feature Movie

Best Actor – Parody Release

Best Actress – All-Girl Release

Best Actress – Couples-Themed Release

Best Actress – Feature Movie

Best Art Direction

Best Cinematography

Best Editing

Best Music

Best New Starlet

Best Non-Sex Acting Performance

Best Scene – All-Girl

Best Scene – Couples-Themed Release

Best Scene – Non-Feature Release

Best Scene – Parody Release

Best Scene – Vignette Release

Best Special Effects

Best Supporting Actor

Best Supporting Actress

Couples-Themed Release of the Year

Crossover Star of the Year

Director of the Year – Feature Release

Director of the Year – Non-Feature Release

Director of the Year – Parody

Director of the Year: Body of Work

European Director of the Year

European Feature Release of the Year

European Non-Feature Release of the Year

Feature Movie of the Year

Female Performer of the Year

Feminist Porn Release of the Year

Fetish Release of the Year

Foreign Female Performer of the Year

Foreign Male Performer of the Year

Gay Director of the Year

Gay Movie of the Year

Gay Performer of the Year

Girl/Girl Performer of the Year

Gonzo Release of the Year

Interracial Release of the Year

Latin-Themed Release of the Year

Male Performer of the Year

MILF Performer of the Year

Parody Release of the Year: Comedy

Parody Release of the Year: Drama

Pro-Am Release of the Year

Screenplay of the Year

Specialty Release of the Year

Transsexual Director of the Year

Transsexual Performer of the Year

Transsexual Release of the Year

Vignette Release of the Year

How Long Does it Take to Become an AVN Hall of Famer?

How Long Must I Work To Be An AVN Hall

Looking over the list of 2015 AVN Hall of Name inductees, we found some favorites listed, and Kaylani Lei caught my eye because it seemed like she “just started” in 2002, and entrance into the hallowed hall should take some more time to earn… (this is purely a subjective reading of what it takes to get into the Hall and is not intended to reflect on her or anyone’s deservedness. I also think 2002 feels like last week instead of 12 years ago)

So, I figured I’d run the numbers and see what came up.

Turns out, it takes 16.76 years of service, on average to get into the Hall, so Kaylani’s 13 years in the industry puts her a little ahead of the curve. Some of her fellow nominees got in as quicker than the average – Kelly Madison (12 years),  Dan O’Connell (13), Tim Von Swine and Porno Dan (14) and Joanna Jet (15).  But most took a little longer: Alana Evans and Wesley Pipes (17), Eli Cross (18), Andre Madness (19), Billy Glide and Craven Moorehead (20), Greg Alves (21), Marci Hirsch (23), Howard Levine, Talon and Rayveness (25), Will Ryder (29), Karen Summer (33), Marc Dorcel (36) and the longest time to induction ever goes to this year’s honoree, Al Goldstein (47 years).

Some other fun facts – Joey Stefano and Victoria Paris were both inducted in 1997 with only 8 years under their belts; Shy Love got inducted next fastest with only 10 years in the industry.

This analysis is also incomplete in that we don’t list every inductee; just the ones we have database records on; so not everyone in the executive branch is listed (Sorry Bonnie!) nor is anyone in the Pleasure Products or Internet Branch listed, as we don’t cover those parts of the industry.

I put the spreadsheet up on Google Docs for those of you interested in having a look.  The “First Year” column is pulled from our “Years Active” field except in cases where it was clearly wrong, i.e. Christian Mann has a couple titles listed in the IAFD from last year, but he was part of the industry since 1979.  We arrived at that year because he was called a “35 year veteran of the industry” in his obituary.  We noted these cases in the aptly named NOTES field. :-)  And since this is the “Class of 2015” we use that year for our calculations, even tho we’re still in 2014 as of this writing…

You’re free to make comments on the spreadsheet.

 

 

Congratulations Timmy

I would like to congratulate Baron T.Otto Wilhelm Gunther Dietrich Von Swine IVth otherwise known as Tim Von Swine to you commoners for his induction into the AVN Hall of Fame. He joins his partner in crime, Mike John (2014 class), in the Hall for his contributions to gonzo with his no holds barred pig slop.

Von Swine at the center of attention

I first met Timmy almost a decade ago through Jake Malone (RIP) and was shocked that he knew me from my old reviews on ADT. He pulled no punches describing the ins and out of the industry, and that candor was refreshing even if it turned off others and may have held him back in the business. Whether it was discussing hockey, music, his favourite women, or his work, he wasn’t going to bullshit you.

I salute you, Swine, and we need to chug some beers next month.