At Ginger’s request, today on Spice Radio XM103’s YouPorn, we’ll be talking about Ten Little Maidens, a semi-hard to find John Seeman film from 1985. The film is loosely based on Agatha Christie’s And Then There Were None (later remade as Ten Little Indians) where a group of people are sent to Indian Island and accused of murders.
Our movie starts on a more light-hearted note, with Kitten Natividad as a mail carrier going on her appointed rounds. She stops at Harry Reems‘ house and she can’t but notice that he’s eating Ginger Lynn out on the couch. Kitten can’t help but try to hit them with their mail as she peeps through the mail slot. (Who could resist?)
Harry is eating Ginger out as he gets hit with the mail, then moves to a quick bout of fucking before Ginger returns the oral favor. Lots of smiles from both parties throughout the blowjob. Ginger is in her prime and Harry can’t shut up during the scene — “Look at that little mouth!” — but she gets him hard again before she lowers herself down on his cock for some cowgirl. She gyrates her hips around before going face down on the couch so Harry can take her side-saddle doggie style. There are some odd cuts of Kitten’s eyes peeping in intercut throughout. Ginger lets out these great little squeals as she’s getting fucked and finally Harry pulls out and jerks off all over back, hitting her hair.
They have a little snuggle afterwards and then Harry starts going through the mail — all bills — until he reads a letter offering an all-expenses paid trip to a “little ole island paradise” “You are herewith cordially invited to an all-expense paid erotic orgy to be held on Bacchanale Island on the weekend of May the seventh … In anticipation of your acceptance, I have enclosed airline tickets for both of you and a friend of your choice. Upon your arrival, a boat will be awaiting you at Marina del Sol for your passage to my island of sensual pleasures. I, my wife and my staff look forward to your joining on this most auspicious occasion.”
And they’re off!
There’s a sailing montage as they get to out the island of Harry and Ginger snuggling on the boat as a female vocalist sings on the soundtrack. Harry and Ginger ooze an easy chemistry, with a lot of smiles and good vibes. Eventually the snuggling and good times heats up as Ginger pulls out his cock and starts giving it a sucking as the captain tries not to look too interested in the proceedings… there’s a lot of good eye contact in the blowjob, but it comes to an abrupt end as they approach the island. Renfro (Jamie Gillis) approaches in a Zodiac, boards the yacht and welcomes them by name to the island. Harry is somewhat taken aback as he didn’t pass along Ginger’s name, but Jamie explains the master of the house likes to know who his guests are. Jamie grudgingly carries the bags up a steep hill, and when they arrive at the house, they are introduced to the maid, Tabitha (Nina Hartley), who shows them to their room.
Harry asks Nina about the other guests, but she doesn’t know about any other guests. This strikes Harry as odd. They find some other folks lounging and swimming by the pool, but ominous chords on the soundtrack and a mysterious person pulling down a window shade let us know something might not quite be right. Ginger excuses herself to take a shower as Harry goes out to get the lay of the land.
More peeping as we see Ginger, naked in the bathroom, through a peephole. She lathers herself up in the shower when Janey Robbins comes in and grabs her ass. She thinks it’s Harry and gasps when she turns around to see that it’s not. She puts up no fight when Janey climbs in the shower with her, and soon the two are really getting to know one another. This is a quick scene with no real payoff.
Cut to the kitchen where Nina is putting some chickens into the oven while Jamie tries to eat her ass. To give him something to do, she gives him one of the chickens, and Jamie fucks it while staring at Nina’s ass. Nina keeps swatting him away, and he finally cums on the chicken, much to Nina’s amusement as she puts it back in the oven.
Ginger is getting dressed for dinner in a costume provided for her, and shows Harry this dildo that she slides up inside her and pulls her panties up over.
As everyone sits around the table in strange costumes that reveal quite a bit of themselves, a mysterious hand presses PLAY on a cassette deck and we hear the voice of their host, Mr. U.N. Seen apologize for not making the erotic gathering after all, but, rest assured, that they will feel his presence as festivities progress, and in his absence Tabitha and Renfro will be able to sate their every thirst.
Ginger asks Jamie for some salad dressing and he offers creamy Italian, which of course, he takes to the kitchen and jerks off on the salad. Everyone around the table starts to get turned on by the food, and it turns into a giant food orgy. The couples seem to be Harry and Ginger, Paul Thomas and Amber Lynn, Richard Pacheco and Janey Robbins, and Eric Edwards and Lisa De Leeuw.
Harry starts giving Janey the eye, and PT and Amber start eating in a viciously seductive way, taking bites of their chicken, and then the orgy begins.
Ginger starts sucking Pacheco while Eric and Lisa are going crazy over a corncob. PT starts in on Amber’s tits, pouring wine all over them. Janet shoves Pacheco’s cock into a peach and then gives him head while Amber fellates a cucumber. Ginger is trying to suck Harry to hardness, while Lisa does the same to Eric. Jamie and Nina come in and join the fun. Jamie starts sicking a pig’s snout as Nina dives into Lisa’s bush. Jamie goes back and forth licking the pig, then licking Amber’s ass.
Nina is eating Ginger while Pacheco fucks Janey while she blows Harry. Ginger is also masturbating with a corncob. Harry, on the table, leaves Janey and turns his attention to Amber who is sucking him while PT fucks her. Jamie takes amber off the table, lays the sucking pig on her back and starts fucking her and shoving grapes into her mouth as everyone else cums on their partners. Jamie then eats Amber and licks the pig, finally cumming on the pig’s snout and Amber’s twat. Harry them cums on Amber’s tits.
After dinner, Eric toasts his host and hostess in their absence, and the mysterious hand press play on a tape from an envelope marked “After Dinner”
On the tape, Mr. Seen announces that no one will leave the island alive, as they’ve all led evil, erotically charged lives, and it is time for them to pay for their crimes. Right after the tape is over, Pacheco collapses, and PT determines that Pacheco was poisoned by arsenic. Janey is nonplussed and heads off to bed and Eric follows her up. Harry and Ginger follow suit, leaving PT kneeling over the body.
Up in their room, Janey has Eric tied spread-eagle onto a bench made specially for that task and is blowing him. She swallows him down to the root a few times, then climbs on reverse cowgirl, her nipple piercings swaying with each bounce. Eyes appear behind a painting, and there’s a knock at the door. She dismounts and lets Amber in as the eyes continue to watch through the painting. Eric makes his dick stand up when Amber comes in, which makes her happy, since it’s polite to stand when a lady enters the room.
Amber sits herself down and Janey grabs a banana and inserts it into Amber, who then takes over and uses it as a dildo as Janey covers Eric’s cock with whipped cream, and then sprinkles some nuts on it, which seems redundant. Janey then instructs her to stand over Eric so he can eat the banana while Amber eats his banana. (Symmetry!) Eric is mostly soft through this scene, but Amber does her best to cover up that fact. Janey then covers Amber’s buttcheeks with whipped cream and she goes to town cleaning it off, while Eric focuses on Amber’s snatch. Janey makes Amber sit up, freeing up Eric’s dick so Janey can ride it, while putting whipped cream on Amber’s tits which she licks off. Finally, we cut to a dick cumming, but it is very difficult to put the dick in context. It looks like it is in a bunch of whipped cream, but it’s abstract at best.
The next morning, Nina is sweeping the pool deck when she discovers Jamie’s dead body with a rubber duck stuck on his cock. Harry deduces he died of strangulation based on how tightly the duck is on his cock. He and Ginger make their way to the dining room where the find a broken statue. PT hatches a plan to find their assailant.
We next see Eric pulling Amber’s body out of the pool. “Oh no! Not Candy! What a waste!” (He grabs a skimmer) “Come here little fishy!”
PT and Nina finish searching the house, and PT does his best Cary Grant into a mirror prompting Nina to exclaim “What a great Peter Lorre!”
Her grieving is over as she determines the best course of action is a siesta seducing PT. Nina’s marvelous ass is on nicely on display here as she blows PT; but we see someone looking at them thru a one-way mirror. The cocksucking is brief, but only so she can dance and show off her ass more and its wonderful tan line. She rides PT briefly on the canopy bed before he takes her doggie style. They have a brief but vigorous shag, and he throws her off the bed as he jerks off. He collapes on the bed after he cums, and the canopy falls on him and kills him.
Cut to Nina cleaning up the remnants of another broken maiden.
Nina is scared to be alone, so she and Janey go up to her room and have a go at things. Janey ties a bandana around Nina’s next and puts a cowboy hat on her and has her enter a cage and ride a white fur spring mounted saddle with a dildo attached. Janey wraps her breasts around a pole and plays with her nipples so the rings clink together; and then we see someone else peeking in through a hole in the wall.
Cut to Harry and Ginger releasing some tension in the sauna. Lots of kissing here as Harry massages her breasts. I don’t know if Ginger ever looked better. Harry slides a finger down to her clit and makes nice while making out with her. He works his mouth down there as she lays back and enjoys it.
Back to Janey and Nina, and Janey now has a snake wrapped around her, as she makes Nina ride harder and harder so she can cum. As Nina’s riding, she begins to notice the snake wrapping itself tighter around Janey…
Back in the sauna, Ginger is blowing Harry, and in the bedroom, Nina and Janey have moved onto the bed, and the snake is nowhere to be found., but they do find a double dildo-vibrator which they use… until it electrocutes them. (D’oh!)
In the sauna, Harry has Ginger in a standing 69 that doesn’t last nearly long enough, as a hand sneakily turns the thermostat up, causing steam to rise as they’re going at it doggie style. Steam obscures the frame, and we hear a cat meow… since we hear the cat meow after every death so far, we have to assume that our leads are dead…
Lisa bursts into the bedroom where Eric waits out an electrical storm handling a gun. When there’s nothing to do but wait, the only thing to do is fellate, and Lisa goes to town on Eric’s cock. No wood problems here. She takes him off the bed, opens her robe, and lies back on a chair. He massages her great tits for a bit before moving downtown. He gets a weird taste, as he remembers a story PT told about how the French women in WWII would put arsenic on their genitals killing the man who eats them out.
Lisa knocks over a maiden and has a glass of wine when Harry and Ginger burst in, much to Lisa’s dismay. She blathers for a moment about how they’re all immoral and deserve to die before she drinks some poisoned wine and offs herself.
Harry and Ginger jump in the Zodiac and head back out to the yacht which takes them back to the mainland.
To be honest, I was hoping for a bit more from the movie. All the sex scenes seemed too short and not particularly paced well. There were moments in all of the sex scenes which were good, but they never really lasted. Thus the problem shoehorning 10 scenes and plot into an 84 minute film (more like 80 when you take out the credits.)
This could be considered a parody, tho I think it more of an homage. It sticks pretty close to the story laid out in And Then There Were None, tho with sex and a bit more humor.
We were a little rushed this week, since it was my first time on with Christy, so next week, we’ll be on at 11:30 AM Pacific / 2:30 PM Eastern for a half hour chatting about Christy and my favorite movie of hers, Comeback.