Today on Spice Radio: American Desire (1981)

Today is Legends Day on Spice Radio’s YouPorn and Veronica Hart will be on the show with Christy and Ginger, so I’ll be on the show beforehand (around 2:30 Eastern, 11:30 Pacific) talking about American Desire, a 1981 film by Lasse Braun.

East Coast Represent!

This tale of a couple stuck in a rut was shot in New York City, Long Island and Connecticut and it’s fun to see brief shots of the city in all its grungy glory.  (A marquee advertised “Air Plane” and we see the Twin Towers in the background as cars drive out of the city.)

The movie opens with a flaccid Bob (R. Bolla) and Sheila (Veronica Hart) watching an old kung-fu movie on TV.  They’re both lamenting that their sex life has, er, petered out.  They still love each other, but their torrid love affair has made way for comfortable evenings watching TV and sharing snacks, and it’s not a place either are particularly happy with.  They pull off a couple in their mid-30s convincingly, even tho Veronica was around 25 when she shot this, it helps that she’s paired with an actor actually in his mid-30s, the 34 year old R. Bolla. He thinks out loud that “maybe one person isn’t enough… or maybe one person is too many.”

The next morning, Sheila leaves a note for Bob saying she’s running to see her Dad for some advice and then running errands in the City. He throws the note off their back porch into the reeds below.

Next up, we see Sheila’s Dad (Jack Teague) thinking in his backyard with a notebook on his knee as his young partner (Mai Lin) looks on from upstairs, asking if he’s getting any work done.  He mentions he could use some inspiration, so she comes down to give him some. What follows is a pretty realistically shot sex scene, where there’s a lot of kissing and foreplay going on.  He has a thumb up inside her as she plays with his cock.  When she moves down to blow him, Braun makes sure to keep Jack’s face in the shot, instead of just focusing on the penetration.

In the midst of their tryst, Sheila shows up at the sliding glass door overlooking the patio and seems put out that she can’t talk to her Dad, as opposed to being completely and utterly freaked out by the fact that she walked in on her Dad and his special lady friend going at it right as he’s sliding himself inside for the first time.  This reaction is a bit odd.

The scene continues with some brief missionary and then Jack pulls out as Mai jerks him off.  Jack’s hips keep bucking the whole time which is a nice touch and adds some sensuality to the scene.  Sheila just takes off, not bothering to talk to her Dad after all.

Sheila’s Day Out (nice red T-Bird convertible!) continues with a trip to her grandfather’s abandoned house. She finds the front door locked, but goes around the back and lets herself in, only to be startled by George (George Payne), an academic who is poking around the house looking to see “what original architecture is left” because he’s “completing  a dissertation on comparative American literature and [Sheila’s Dad? Granddad?] is the best in that field.”  (Doesn’t make any more sense in the movie either.)  Sheila offers to give George her Dad’s number.

Meanwhile, back at the house, Bob calls an escort service and is excited to see Mistress Candice show up in her street clothes.  He’s all hot to trot, moving in to feel her up and lift up her shirt to look at her rack and she pushes him off, asking where the bathroom is, so she can get ready. He shows her the door and waits.  She comes out in full leather dominatrix outfit with a cat o’nine tails and proceeds to tease the hell out of him.  It’s a fun scene that is pretty hot, but there’s no sex in it.  We do get to see her spectacular rack, but her nipples only see pleasure from her own tongue – Bob is denied.  She leaves him with blue balls.  The scene is played for laughs.  At one point, Bob goes in for a kiss and she backs off.  He complains that he just wants to give her a kiss, since she has such a pretty mouth — and we cut to a closeup and her dental work leaves, well, a little something to be desired.

Sheila drives home to find Bob sleeping in bed, but finds leather straps around the house. She’s pissed about his whores, and he’s pissed they’re not fucking each other. He mentions again “Maybe one person isn’t enough.” and he wants her permission to step out since he doesn’t want to lie to her.  (There’s a confused nobility there.)  She laments that men can just ring up and order sex like room service, where it takes women months to figure out who to seduce, to do the seducing, etc.  Bob says she just needs to fuck someone already, that she’s wasting valuable time.  It’s an interesting philosophical debate.

George shows up at Sheila’s Dad’s house to drop off some of his writing, and instead finds himself being seduced by Mai.  She makes her move and drops to her knees.  George asks a sensible question – what happens if your old man walks in?  And she assures him that Dad Welles would be fine with it.  Mai has long nails which she uses to great effect on George’s shaft.  He gives himself over to it and grabs her head and starts guiding her strokes.

Cut to Dad and Sheila in the T-Bird on their way home.

Mai and George have moved to the bedroom and George goes down on her, then she rides him cowgirl and in a really spectacular move, launches herself off his cock and right onto his face in one leap.

Sheila approaches the house and hears the ruckus and sees George nailing Mai on the bed.  Her Dad approaches and she apologizes to him, since she gave George the address, and Dad, in full on creeper, says it’s more than fine and asks is she would like to join them.  She shakes him off and runs away.

There’s a drum beat playing on the soundtrack in synch with George’s pounding and it crescendos with his cumming on her belly.  Sheila’s Dad appears in the doorway, all grins.  Mai makes the introductions, George is horrified at the social faux pas, but Sheila’s Dad will have none of it.  “Nonsense!  If you made Mai Lin happy, then I’m happy!” and then Mai kisses George.  Kinda weird, kinda funny.

Bob is driving down the country roads in his (NJ plated – represent!)  Jeep when he comes across hitchhiker Lysa Thatcher who is looking for a place to camp out.  As they drive, she lights up a joint and he asks for a toke “I’m not an old man, you know!” and they head to a friend’s place where he has a barn/farmohouse that she can camp out in.

Meanwhile, Sheila is getting dressed up in a fancy hat and red lipstick.

At the barn, Lysa infantilizes herself further by riding on a very small wooden rocking horse. We see a shot of her between his legs, Mrs. Robinson style, and she mentions how much she loves his boots, and she crawls over to lick them, her ass cheeks hanging out of her cut-offs.  (Take *that* Daisy Duke!)  She works her way up his body and stands as he kisses her and moves his hands all over her.  She brushes him off and starts setting up her bunk, bending at the waist and driving us a little wild.  She finds a cat o’nine-tails and chain collar and asks if Bob knows about those things.  She hads him the cat o’nine tails, and he can’t possibly whip her.  She opens her shirt revealing her breasts and she asks to be hit, like a Daddy hits his little girl.    He starts to hit her a little harder and there’s a cut, so I assume the modern scissors have robbed us of a little more play… but at her urging, he gets his fingers all up in her (“Fuck it!  Fuck it with your fingers!”) and he brings her to orgasm.

And finally Bob gets his blowjob… and what a BJ it is.  He’s slapping her with his cock until finally they’re fucking doggie style, with her tits pressed into the bedsprings which we see from underneath.  Bob says “See what happens when you hitchhike!?” and she jerks him off onto her tongue.  So far, best scene in the movie.

Sheila heads back to Grandfather Welles’ house and a stranger (Roy Stuart) appears outside.  Without her knowing, he follows her into the house and confronts her.  He asks “Do you like my house?” and she says she can’t stay, that her husband is waiting for her, and he shoves his gloved hand into her crotch.  She protests as he starts to remove her jacket.  He asks “Don’t you like sex?” and she’s getting more upset.  “Tell me how you want to stay!” and she keeps saying no, and he rips open her shirt and throws her on the floor.  He rips open her bra and she’s yelling “Don’t touch me!” and he yells “Quiet!”  and as he is playing with her pussy thru her underwear, she gives up a little.  (Not one of the best messages, I suppose…)

He works a fingered finger into her doggie style and she squirms away.  She’s trying to get her clothes back on and run away.  She threatens to scream, and he tells her to scream “Who can hear you?” and she runs upstairs, but he’s too fast for her.

He lays her down on the bedroom floor, removes his gloves, opens his pants and lifts her head to his cock, and she blows him as she rubs her pussy for a second before he’s fucking her missionary.

As with these non-consensual scenes, it’s tough to really use them to get yourself off.

Construction worker Dave Ruby comes in the house and notices her clothes on the dining room floor and heads off to investigate.  Sheila comes downstairs naked and runs into him.  He asks if she’s all right, and she says “Never better.” and then makes moves on him.  He resists, “I’m a married man!  I’ve got a wife and two kids!” and she starts to go down on him.  The sexual prey becomes the predator?  As she blows him, he just keeps repeating that he can’t believe this is happening.  She takes him down to the root (not a difficult task, it seems) and she rips his T-Shirt off him.  He awkwardly falls to the floor, with his face landing in her lap.  There’s a way too brief long shot of him with his face buried in her bush while her head is going up and down a mile a minute on his cock.   Then, Rapist Roy comes back in for seconds and shoves his dick in her mouth.  There’s some brief continuity issues with positions, and then Dave shoves himself up her ass.  She pulls him out and jerks him off all over her pussy and belly, then Roy cums all over her face.  She’s a mess when its over.

Bob returns home with Lysa  in tow and Sheila is waiting for him on the bed.  Her experience at her grandfather’s house as sexually awakened her, and she tells him she did it, as if she was the cat who ate the canary. She chalked it up to acting out. So, maybe it wasn’t a rape, but a fantasy fulfillment?  She recounts the tale of her rape with breathless excitement as Bob attacks her, repeating the things she is describing.  (We see that Lysa Thatcher is overhearing the story.)  Bob is dominating a little bit as he demands to be told what happened.  Lysa drops trou and starts to play with herself outside their bedroom as she listens to Bob and Sheila fuck.  “Is this how he did it?  I gotta know!  It’s driving me crazy!”

They switch to missionary as she tells the Ballad of the Construction Worker,  “he was rough, but I wanted it rough! … I did it, and I don’t want to stop.  I don’t want to stop!” and she rides him reverse cowgirl.  Bob says he’s going to cum and she says no, that she wants to taste it. So she bounces off him and onto the bed where she jerks him climax, licking up every drop.

As music starts to play, Sheila find Lysa on the chair and they begin to make out.  They move to the bedroom where they can scissor each other. The girls make eye contact which is very hot; then as they 69, Bob appears, and he and Sheila share Lysa’s tail end and Sheila blows him like crazy.  Bob fucks Sheila a bit more and then the girls share a blow job to its conclusion.

Fun fact: Roy Stuart also wrote the music for the movie.

Wow wow wow wow wow.

I had never seen this movie, but since Veronica Hart was going to be on the show, I thought I should review a movie that featured her in a leading role, and boy, was this it!

She doesn’t get naked until more than halfway through the movie, but once she does, she’s an unstoppable force of nature.  She devours R. Bolla and Lysa Thatcher at the end.

The movie’s title is odd, “American Desire” as I am having a hard time defining the desire — is it merely sexual, or is it the desire to settle down and share your life with someone else?  Bob and Sheila start the movie as a couple and end the movie as a couple, and ostensibly, the shenanigans that happen in the middle are supposed to strengthen their resolve as a couple, even if it doesn’t involve monogamy.

It’s left a bit ambiguous (or perhaps I am just projecting) if Rapist Roy (and the construction worker) was a pre-arrangement or not.  I think I have trouble if it was a real rape, since it falls back on the trope that “all girls want it” and that’s not the greatest message to send, I think… nor does it work that well dramatically.  If it was pre-arranged, then it gives Sheila some power and we don’t have to watch that scene between the fingers covering our eyes.

I don’t remember Lasse Braun as an filmmaker, tho I do remember it being a big deal when he came back with a three picture for Sin City.  I didn’t get the historical significance at the time, tho Wikipedia does an OK job of filling in the gaps, as does

Fun fact – modern day director Axel Braun is Lasse’s son.

Today on Spice Radio: Taxi Girls (1979)

Today is Legends Day on Spice Radio’s YouPorn and Serena will be on the show with Christy and Ginger, so I’ll be on the show beforehand (around 2:30 Easter, 11:30 Pacific) talking about Taxi GirlsJourdan Alexander’s 1979 light sex romp.

The plot is breezy enough – mostly – cops round up the city’s streetwalkers, so they decide to open a taxi service as a cover.  They run into a bunch of roadblocks along the way, along with a rape at the end that really monkeys with the film’s tone.

There a shitload of people in this movie and all pop in and out.  This is Nancy Suiter‘s movie from top to bottom (and what a bottom!) and she has a lot of really really short sex scenes (the 16 scenes we list are less “scenes” and more “pairings”; some of the scenes are 60 seconds long; some are part of a larger sequence.)

At the top of movie under the credits, we see the town’s hookers being carted off to jail.  Once we’re in the cell, we take care of Scenes 1-3 in our breakdown which takes about 15 minutes. We see our heroine, Toni (Nancy Suiter), intently studying a newspaper while her cellmates –Amika GiortanoNancy SuiterPat ManningHillary Summers and Nancy Hoffman – work on getting the guard Mitch Morrill into the cell so they can fuck him and use his keys to escape.

With the cell door open, Stacy Goldman goes to the sergent’s desk and fucks a reluctant George Mitchell (under the desk!!) who has to deal with a ringing phone and a complaining old lady. The old lady is a riot.  They move into the cel where it’s easier to fuck.

Hillary Summers and Nancy Hoffman keep to themselves and engage in some fisting which you won’t find in the modern releases of the movie.  (I had to go back to the dubbed, Dutch subtitled VHS copy Peter sent me to see what was cut.)  They girls do some obscured 69 before Nancy Hoffman slips her hand into Hillary Summers.

Pat Manning does most of the heavy lifting with Mitch Morrill, tho she does allow Amika Giortano to get some licks in.  Nancy Suiter‘s involvement is limited to Mitch eating her out while she continues to study the newspaper.  Mitch eventually cums on Pat’s face, all while keeping a finger in Suiter’s twat.

A bunch of girls walk out of the cell (far more than had the sex) leaving the two cops and Nancy Suiter who is exclaiming “I got it!” as she’s reading the paper.  She discovered the ad for “Drivers TAXI MEN/WOMEN” and has found her calling.

We see Toni driving the cab and a fare asks her “What’s a nice girl like you doing driving a cab?” and she says with a leer “I do other things, too!) and we cut to him holding out a $100 bill and he undresses while making small talk about her stand-up comedy aspirations… “But just want people to like me for my head” and he says “I want to like you for your head too!” and she drops to her knees and takes him into her mouth… AND THEN WE’RE DONE!  (WHAT?!? There should be much more of a blowjob scene here, but alas, there is not… )

Back in the cab, two guys (Unknown Male 5505-D and Unknown Male 5505-E) are in the backseat discussing stocks and another (Unknown Male 5505-F) is in the front getting his limp cock jerked three or four times as they’re driving.

We cut to another passenger, Alan B. Colberg, who works a dildo into Toni’s twat as she’s driving. The overdubbed audio here is horrendous.  Most of the overdubbed levels are awful on the VCX VOD version I was reviewing at HotMovies; the Arrow levels are correct… so if you have pick one to watch, go with the Arrow version.

These scenes – 4-6 in our breakdown – take 90 seconds for the lot.

Toni sees some of the girls on the street and shows them the wad of cash she’s made in the afternoon.  Toni says she’s going to get some cabs, and the girls (Aubrey Nichols, Amika GiortanoSerena andStacy Goldman ) go over to see Teddy (Mike Ranger) , the taxi owner, to convince him to give all the girls jobs… and by convince, I mean have sex with.  We start with Toni blowing him and then Aubrey gives a little 69 action before Toni mounts him.  Aubrey stays on his face as Toni makes out with her and sucks her tits.  Serena plays with his balls and jerks him off (with a little lick at the end) to finish him off.  Amika and Stacy are there naked, but don’t really participate

Toni asks for 10 cabs, but Teddy says no deal, and they vow to run him out of business.

Toni and some more girls head to the bank to get a loan.  Candida Royalle asks the loan officer (Unknown Male 5505-G)  if they have a “lawaway loan — you know, lay now, pay later?” Some cute stilted, double-entendre dialogue (and a quick no-finish blowjob from Stacy Goldman) later and they adjourn to see his boss, John Seeman.

The usual four sex girls (Aubrey NicholsAmika GiortanoNancy Suiter and Stacy Goldman) take on John Seeman (wearing thick glasses and a silly chin beard.) Amika starts things off with a blowjob, then they lay him on the floor, but all he can think of is collateral. Aubrey rides him as Toni makes out with him. Aubrey jumps off and jerks him off to pop and Amika comes in and helps her clean him up.  Poor Stacy is left out like the runt unable to get to mama’s teat.  He signs off on the loan amid promises of being driven around anywhere.

The girls show up on a car lot and find a car to get the company started.  The car salesman, R.J. Reynolds, doesn’t really want to move on price, but the girls say “If you go down, so will we!” and the pack of girls leads him into the office, but our Gang of Four (Aubrey NicholsAmika GiortanoNancy Suiter and Stacy Goldman) tend to his needs.  First up, Aubrey blows him, taking him effortlessly to the root, and the other girls are on the couch and ask if he’s like to see a blond, brunette or a redhead, and he says he’d like to see them all — so Nancy and Stacy attack Amika; Nancy handling above the waist and Stacy tending to downstairs. R.J. really plays up the sex talk and eventually makes his way over to the couch (much to Aubrey’s dismay, she has a priceless “what I’d do wrong?” look on her face) where the throws a few humps into Amika before pulling out and blowing his load on her bush.

The girls chisel R.J. down to $2200, but in the next shot, we see a fleet of Red Ford Fairmonts pull up next to a cab line and steal a whole bunch of customers.

Next, we meet Harold his wife, and she’s fighting with her dog and he offers to take the dog for a walk.  He ties the dog to a fire hydrant as Toni’s cab pulls up, he jumps in asking to go “where my wife won’t see us” and off they go.

We see another guy riding in the cab and he flips on Little Orphan Dusty (also directed by Jourdan Alexander) where he briefly watches Rhonda Jo Petty blow Turk Lyon (RIP) before asking Toni for “the real thing” , but she demurs saying she has to be on stage in a half hour and he should catch one of her other girls.

We then cut to the comedy club where we see one of the comics finishing up, the emcee comes out and introduces Toni.  She opens with “Any of you recognize me?” and then launches into her routine.

Afterwards, we get some odd flashback scene of someone leaving Toni with an echoy voiceover and then a scene between her and John Holmes.  This is probably the most “conventional” scene in the movie as it takes place on a bed between only two people. He starts by going own on her and she grinds her hips into him as she cums, the he slides into missionary for awhile befre flippeing her over doggie style where we really get to see That Which Made Him Famous.  He finishes by climbing on her and sliding his dick into her mouth and then jerking off onto her tits.

Cut to Tommy’s taxi stand and there’s a revolt among his drivers. Seems the girls are taking their business and he has to lay them all off.  This pisses the drivers off and they vow to exact revenge.

Meanwhile, the girls are still doing their thing, driving around a corporate bigwig while he’s being blown by two girls in the backseat.  It’s a pretty good BJ scene.

Next cab fare has a guy complaining about the sex doll he has to fuck — he only has 20 bucks after all… so he fucks the sex doll.  More funny than hot.

Back at the comedy club, John Holmes is waiting for Toni, and we get a glimpse of Svetlana doing part of her set on stage.

At the end of a dark street, Bud Wise and Jamie Gillis kidnap Serena and take her to a warehouse to rape her so hard, her ass “will be too red to sit down in a cab.”  Gillis fucks her from behind as Bud Wise shoves his cock down her throat.  There’s a lot of yelling, and more guys show up and eventually they drag Toni in with them.

Holmes takes a competing cab ride home  and gets wind of something going from the other driver.  Once home, Holmes calls into the girls’ dispatch and has everyone meet him up at the address he heard in Tommy’s guy’s cab.

“It’s not so bad is it?” Jamie purrs in Toni’s ear.  She also manages to capture the dead eye look as he’s fucking her.  Way Creepy.

Finally, the guys cum on Serena and Toni’s faces, as the other girls come in carrying crowbars and billy clubs , and they attack the male cabbies, beating them senseless and rescuing their own.  Toni has her wits about her, but Serena is all fuck-drunk, looking like she’s been through a war.

Toni’s apparently got herself arrested and she’s getting dressed for court.  She promises Holmes that she’s done.

She gets to court, and the judge is Harold! The guy with the dog!  The defendant pleads guilty, but the judge insists on seeing her in his chamber, where he quickly disrobes and has her “serve her sentence” (I mean blow him.)

Like most blowjobs in this movie, this one lasts 20 seconds and – unlike the other  BJs – is interrupted by the “THE END” title card.

[UPDATE: Well, that was … something.  I was dropped into the middle of an Abbott and Costello routine with a heaping dose of Marx Brothers. Lots of confused wordplay, gender mix-ups, and hysterical misreading of the review.]


Today on Spice Radio: Trashy Lady (1985)

Today on Spice Radio YouPort (XM103 at 2:30 PM Eastern / 11:30 AM Pacific) I’ll be talking with Ginger and Christy about the 1985 movie Trashy Lady starring Ginger and their guest, Cara Lott.

The movie starts out with 1920s gangster Dutch Siegel is (Harry Reems) on the phone and his moll, Cara, is complaining that he spends too much time working, and not enough time taking care of her. .. so he takes care of her.

He starts out eating her out and then she returns the favor.  I’m a big fan of hands-free cock sucking and she starts by pulling his boxers down and then just taking his floppy member right in her mouth.  They bang missionary for a while and then he flips her over for some doggie and he cums on her ass.  She looks pretty good here, all natural and into her partner.

Afterwards, they go to a speakeasy and Dutch wants to leave, but Cara doesn’t; and she ends up leaving him for good.  (“Dutch?  Fuck off!”)  Dutch becomes enamored with the cigarette girl (Ginger Lynn) and asks Tony, the owner (Steve Drake) about her.  Tony plays dumb, but Dutch says everyone knows he fucks the new girls before putting them out on the floor.

So we flashback to Tony fucking Kitty standing doggie style.  She’s not enjoying herself, but she needs the job, so she just takes it.  Ginger has most of her clothes on, but she’s got a great all-in-one garter/stocking set on that shows off her ass. This is not a sexually exciting screen as Kitty is all but waiting for Tony to finish up; and he does by cumming a bit on her ass.

Dutch calls Kitty over and asks her to be his gal.

Next, we see Dutch’s car pull up to a curb outside his office and he gets out and sees newsie Tom Byron.  He flips him a quarter to watch the car as he goes inside.

A quick note about the art direction – really top notch.  They shoot in decent locations that look the period, and they rented the right cars.  Costumes are paid attention to and are period appropriate.

Dutch sends for his rival, Big Louie’s (Hershel Savage) moll, Rita (Amber Lynn), and she’s got tough talk for him.  Dutch wants Rita to help make Kitty less classy.  “What a guy like me needs, is a Trashy Lady, just like you!” and he plies her with some jewelry.  Since Big Louie is in the slammer, she takes the deal. To show her appreciation, she blows him.  They’re both clothed throughout the scene, and she asks him to cum on her face, and really — how can he not oblige?  (For a second it looked as if she was going to be able to make him cum; but at the last minute, he had to finish himself off.)

Rita says she needs a guy to help make Kitty trashy, and right at that moment, he hears Tommy yelling from downstairs.  We cut to Tommy laid on a bed with Amber and Ginger on either side of him.  Amber starts sucking his dick, giving Ginger instruction along the way. Ginger asks questions along the way, and really works his dick over, taking it all the way down.  Amber paints her nails hooker red while Ginger goes to town.

Ginger is all smiles and just looks great, but once she gets him hard, Amber pushes her away and sits on Tommy’s cock.  Ginger positions herself around to get a good vantage.  Amber looks really great as she rides away. Then its Ginger’s turn and she’s all smiles and far more into the sex than she was with Steve.  She bucks into him and when he’s about to cum, Amber reaches her newly polished nails around and jerks him off onto Ginger’s ass.  Ginger asks how she did, and Amber makes a date for more practice the next day.

Next up, Big Louie is in jail, visited by Al (J. Massey) his lawyer(?) who tells Louie about Rita’s deal with Dutch.  Louie, as you might imagine, is none too pleased.  Dutch leaves and sees Tommy on the way out, throwing him a “double sawbuck” for his troubles.

Next, Dutch heads to the local gym where he’s ensuring that his fighter (Francois Papilion) is ready to take a dive that night.  His trainer (Marc Wallice) assures Dutch he will.  Meanwhile, a groupie (Cheri Janvier) is complaining about the lack of sex and Dutch suggests she do something about it — so she DP’s Francois and Marc.  They bang for a while then Marc pulls out of her ass to pop his load, then Francois pulls out of her pussy to cum on her ass.

As Kitty is practicing her swear words, she catches the attention of maid, Bunny Bleu.  Bunny wastes no time sucking Ginger’s tits and then moving down between her legs.  Then it’s Ginger’s turn to eat out, and Bunny hikes up her maid uniform and Ginger gets to work.  Bunny offers her pointers as she goes along, but it’s clear that Ginger is a quick learner.

Rita goes to visit Louie in jail, and he lets her know that he knows of her deal with Dutch… but he misses her and as he tells her the things he’s going to do to her when he gets out, we get a fantasy pairing between the two in the visiting room.  He eats her, she sucks him off, then he gives her a solid fucking on the table.  After some in-and-out, he pulls his cock out and lays it across her bush as he pulls off a patented John Leslie no hands cum shot…

Dutch, a mechanic and Dutch’s bodyguard (Rick Savage) are in an alcohol warehouse when one of Louie’s henchmen opens fire with a tommy gun.

Ginger is in the bath and calls to Bunny who is making the bed while Rick looks on.  Ginger’s being bitchy, er trashy, and Bunny isn’t having any of it.  Rick commiserates about what a bitch Ginger is being and he makes a move on Bunny which ends with her sucking his dick… and interrupting it to answer to Ginger in the tub.

I’ve always found Bunny to be very attractive, but she’s been slightly tarnished by Jerry Butler who compared her to a blow-up “Bobo the Clown” inflatable toy.

She gets up on the edge of the bed, and Rick climbs under to eat her out from behind.  He gets his thumb up in her and she lowers herself down on it.  Soon enough, he takes his thumb out, lays her on the chaise and throws a hump into her and blows a good load on her bush.

Finally, Dutch visits Louie in jail and confronts him about trying to rub him out take over the bootlegging operation.  Dutch says he was pissed about Rita going over to Dutch’s every day, and Dutch explains the score.

Soon thereafter, Louie is out of jail and at the “3rd Annual Brotherhood Convention” we get the big reveal of Kitty, in a gorgeous white satin dress.  She curses a bit and Dutch is enamored with his Trashy Lady.

My colleague, Jamie, over at his site, Videotramp, had this to say about the movie:

Trashy Lady director, Steve Scott, started out working in the publicity department at Universal Studios in the late 1960′s, before venturing into porn in 1975 on a dare. Within the next ten years, Scott churned out roughly twenty-four gay porn films. Some of them were dogs, but most would go on to become gay classics, including Track Meet, A Married Man and A Few Good Men. In 1985, he began experimenting with ‘straight’ porn, shooting three shot-on-film titles for Masterpiece Video (a now-defunct division of 4-Play Video). All three of the films featured an upncoming starlet named Ginger Lynn. Interestingly, their three collaborations, especially Trashy Lady, are still being discussed by porn fans even today ” a testament to their significance. The years truly have been kind to Trashy Lady, which has gone on to become a legitimate adult film classic, often noted by Ginger Lynn aficionados as one of her finest films.

The film was out of print for a long time, but it has since found a new audience on DVD and VOD.  It’s definitely worth a look; pay attention to the Amber/Ginger/Tommy scene with honorable mentions going to the two Bunny Bleu scenes.

Today on Spice Radio: Stud Hunters (1984)

POST-SHOW UPDATE: A caller asked about a movie of Christy’s where she “and another girl are wearing white t-shirt and jeans…” and I stop him and say “Wild Things!” and I was right.  The other girl was Ali Moore. (Who also might have been underage for a bit of her career…)  I am lucky to do a show with and about people I’ve grown up watching.  (If the caller asked about a movie Gina Carrera was in a white T-Shirt, I do not think I could answer.

There was an earlier version of Wild Things with Traci Lords, but it was recut in the wake of her scandal, and her scene was replaced with one feature Brazilian bombshell Elle Rio.

So, Suze Randall is the guest on today’s Legend’s show over at Spice YouPorn, and at 2:30 Eastern/11:30 Pacific we’ll be talking about her 1984 movie Stud Hunters.  Her website claims that Victor Nye directed it, but we think she did; so hopefully she’ll be able to confirm or deny when she talks with Christy and Ginger.

The movie opens with Misty Regan sitting pantless on a desk looking at slides and playing with herself as the voiceover intones:

It seems like just another day to ace centerfold photographer Randi Foxx as she slaves in her studio loft, as her assistant Wimpy (Marc Wallice) dresses the set below.  Little does she realize that the call she won’t answer is the call of destiny.

She picks up the phone and it’s publisher Howard Huge (Michael Morrison) telling her he needs less g/g photoshoots and more b/g.  They flirt on the phone a little, and the camera reveals Desiree Lane sucking his cock.  Morrison is a middle aged paunchy fellow and his sex scene with Desiree is intercut with Randi lining up male models.  Desiree looks great in her RC and Suze really knows how to capture the beauty of the female form.  There’s a limited amount of gyno close-ups, usually just as brief cutaways between wide shots.  Her dirty talk is pretty generic, but she really grinds on his cock.  She lifts herself off for a moment, and it’s pretty cool moment of hovering before she re-impales herself.  They finally move to missionary and then scissoring when he pulls out and cums on her bush and belly.  After he finishes spilling his seed, she asks “Mr. Huge?  Now do I become a centerfold?” and he answers with a leer “Only if I get to fuck you in the ass again!” and she agrees “OK, I guess” and he thrusts into her and he lets out a big squeal.  We’re supposed to think he’s buggering her, I guess…

Next up, Wimpy is watching as Randi is taking pictures of Pipi Anderson and Debi Diamond.  Debi is laying in a grocery cart full of dildoes (excellent visual; Suze knows how to set a scene) but Pippi isn’t really giving her what she wants, so throws Wimpy and Pippi out and considers strapping the dildo on and starts eating Debi while Pippi escapes to the loft in the studio to catch Wimpy fucking a blow up doll’s mouth.  So she drops to her knees and totally deep throats Marc’s cock in the first swallow.

Wimpy looks down on the two girls who have moved to a round bed as Pippi continues to blow him.  Marc moves to the couch and Pippi sits on his cock and we get a lot of nice RC.  Debi is wearing a collar and leash and gets on top of Randi in a 69.  We have a bit more gyno here than we have had before as we linger on Randi’s noshing on Debi’s labia.

Wimpy and Pippi move to a standing doggie as Debi begins to use a dildo on Randi.  After a bit, Wimpy eats Pippi and Debi crawls up and plants herself on Randi’s face.  There are a lot of wide shots here which really show off the girls’ bodies and towards the end, the rhythm of the two scenes are crosscut very quickly as we build up to everyone’s orgasm.  (Wimpy jerks off on Pippi’s belly.)

The voiceover sets the next scene for us: “Never one to turn down a challenge, nubile nympho Fifi Floss works the jock pit of Muscle Beach searching for the Perfect Ten.” and we see Pippi (who is playing Fifi, then) and she approaches Steve Douglas  and in her broken English asks if he wants to take part in a photoshoot.  He tells her she should stop by “The Gym” so she does, and when she gets there, she’s greeted by 5 hard cocks.  The reveal of the cocks is pretty funny as Suze cuts around to each guy’s privates in some sort of underwear, and she has them just kind of flop their cocks out… and the next thing you know, Pipi on the floor and find herself in the middle of a blowbang with Blake PalmerDavid Cannon, Dick TurpinPaul Baressi and Steve Douglas.  The boys give her instructions to not be greedy and to share.

As she continues to blow some of the guys, they lay her down on a workout mat to make more of her orficies available to them.  She seems overwhelmed in a pretty hot way; never out of control just wanting more.  She plays insatiable very well. The guys finish themselves all over her (face and ass mostly) as she asks for more.  The post-coital scene is very artfully arranged with the boys all collapsed around her in a circle as she gets up.  It’s clear that attention was paid to the composition of these shots.

Next up, Lisa Lake and Amy Allison are ogling surfers, and Lisa goes over to Greg Derek and propositions him and they all drive away in their convertible.

The voiceover comes on again as we cut to Wimpy looking at dirty magazines and stroking himself:  “With Randi out there doing some stud hunting on her own, Wimpy catches up on his homework at the studio…” and the doorbell rings.  It’s the girls and their surfer friend and they want to introduce him to Randi, but since she’s not around, she hopes Wimpy will take some polaroids.

The girls share Greg’s cock as Wimpy snaps away. Eventually, he can’t hold himself back and he gets naked and gets in on the fun.  This is my first exposure to either Amy or Lisa before and they’ve got pretty great bodies..  The sex, tho, is shot the most conventionally. Lots of cutaways to sweaty guys from the torso up; gyno closeups; not as many full body shots as we got before.  The girls stay paired off – Lisa with Greg and Amy with Marc/Wimpy.  They end up in a heap on the bed.

Next, we fade in on the oiled wonderment that is Joanna Storm’s chest sunning itself in bikini bottoms on a lounge chair.  The voiceover tells us “High in the hollywood hills, Trashy Blonde, oversexed and underdressed, dreams of the endless orgasm, unaware of what fate has in store for her!” and the phone rings.  It’s Randi asking for a favor – find her some studs.  Joanna doesn’t think that’ll be a problem, she walks around what I think is Venice Beach and amongst all the people sees young(!) adonis, Randy West as the Stud Hunters theme plays (“Some intimate shoving! – “Stud Hunters!” – Some hardcore lovin’ “Stud Hunters!”)

Randy and Joanna retire to Joanna’s place, and Joanna pulls off Randy’s velcro breakway stripper pants (fucking awesome) revealing his hard cock (“Ah! An erection inspection!” he says) and she lays him on a couch and then strips in front of him as he keeps himself hard.  They have playfully stupid dialog as she drops down to blow him more.  They fuck in a few positions, and she looks awesome in every one of them, and then he pulls out and she gives herself a pearl necklace by jerking him off between her tits.

“Meanwhile, Randi surprises Wimpy with the All-American Stud.”

Wimpy shows off the polaroids from his romp with Amy and Lisa, but Randi has Craig Roberts with her, so she tells Wimpy she doesn’t give a shit about his polaroids and kicks him out.  He sneaks off to the loft to watch his boss fuck this guy.

Craig yells at her “Suck it bitch!” as if he’s sticking up for the shitty way she treats Wimpy.  Misty/Randi takes him down to the root and he talks through the whole thing, asking her to “suck it like a lollipop!” and wondering aloud “what that pussy tastes like!” and then he’s fucking her in mish.  Lots of full shots of her great tits straining against her shirt as she’s been fucked silly by this guy.  Her hips buck with his thrusts and he kneads on her tits until they’re red.  Wimpy lurks about allowing them to change positions without us noticing (they’re in doggie!  they’re in reverse cowgirl!”)  She grinds herself into his dick and they share a natural rhythm.  They move back to mish and after hammering away, he pulls out and shoots from her box to her tits, covering her pretty well and she rubs it into herself and the last bit is the headboard falling off the bed they’re on ad they share a laugh as we fade to black, and Wimpy is left stroking his cock.

Pretty good stuff.  Threadbare plot but enough to get us a couple really good sex scenes – standouts are Pipi Anderson’s blowbang and Misty Regan’s shag at the end. Since the girls like it when I rate things, I’d give this a 8.5 out of 10; a solid B+ of a movie with a couple A- sex scenes (Pipi + Guys, Misty, Joanna) and mostly B+ sex scenes (The rest with the Desiree Lane scene maybe getting a B, if only for Michael Morrison’s creepy factor…)

I watched this via VOD on Suze’s site, I’m not aware of it being available for download anywhere else.  DVDs are still available from the usual retailers.


Today on Spice Radio: Lust at First Bite (1979)

Today on Spice Radio’s You Porn (SiriusXM 103 at 11:30 Pacific / 2:30 Eastern) we’ll be talking about Lust at First Bite, a movie featuring today’s guests, Seka and Bill Margold.  Margold appears in the movie, and he co-wrote it as well.

The title is an obvious wink of the George Hamilton Dracula spoof, Love at First Bite, and it’s also a Dracula story, with Jamie Gillis taking on the iconic role.

The movie wastes no time, and as soon as the credits stop, we see Jamie eating out Mina (the exquisite Annette Haven). They’re in a field outside of a castle, and her alabaster skin contrasts nicely with the otherwise dark elements of the scenes (Drac’s cape; the stone slab she’s on…)  She moves to stroking his cock and then she’s on her knees blowing him and he fucks her face a bit.  The scene ends with a voiceover: “When do dreams stop and reality begin?”

The voiceover has us listening to a man and a woman who are driving up to a castle in an old Model A taxi.  He’s complainng about having a hard on and terrible dreams.  We come to the castle is a sanitarium, and it’s run by Dr. Seward (John Leslie) and his sister Sybil (Kay Parker.)  (Happy birthday, Kay who turned 68 years young yesterday!)   The man is none other than Renfield (Richard Bulick, credited as McGoogle Schlepper) and his sister Irene (Pat Manning) is bringing him to the hospital to help stop his nightmares.
The movie is also a light touch featuring PA announcements reminiscent of those on M*A*S*H* – the first of which is “Attention! The first annual Seward Sanitarium rubber raft race is cancelled due to an outbreak of crabs in Ward A.”

Seward speaks to his apple-toting orderly, Henry (Bill Margold),  and dispatches him to see Mrs. Renfeld.  He gripes about his job (“Seward giving me orders, like he owns this place!”) and he comes in to Irene’s room and she’s having a bit of a breakdown and complaining about having nightmares and needing help, and we cut to an exterior shot of the castle as we hear Margold say “You need help?  You want help?!” and he rapes her doggie style.  “You like that, help!” she moans “No, no” and cries throughout most of their encounter. He giggles “How do you like them apples, bitch?” and he crushes an apple in his hand, as we crosscut to him jerking himself off onto her ass. This isn’t something you’d see in modern porn.  Modern porn might start with protestations, but generally the lead to the girl becoming a willing participant. (probably a worse series of events to portray than her crying through the whole thing…)  This is not a long scene — in fact none of them in the movie are, really — one position and out.

Seward walks through the asylum with Dr. Van Helsing (mainstream B- actor Reggie Nalder, here credited as Detlef van Berg) and when he’s introduced to a patient (George Lee) who dresses like a cowboy, sings songs on the guitar and “fornicates with anything — holes in walls, etc.” and happily, we catch him getting blown by, then doggie fucking Nancy Hoffman.  He’s in chaps and she’s bent over a saddle as strains of the William Tell Overture (the Lone Ranger theme) swells on the soundtrack, and he pulls out and cums on her ass. Other patients are introduced, one who dresses like Hitler, and all of them are suffering from lesions of some sort.

(Nalder was reported to be embarrassed by his work in LAFB, but it’s nothing to be particularly ashamed of.  He hit his marks and didn’t bump into the furniture, to paraphrase Spencer Tracy; but I assume his mere presence in an adult movie was enough to cause him some discomfort.)
Next up, Dr. Bradley (Mike Ranger) and a Lucy Webster (Serena) are walking the grounds and he proclaims his love for her. They sit, and she kneels before him.  We then cut to Jonathan Harker (Paul Thomas) sitting at the piano with Mina and the taxi driver (David Lee Bynum) and the taxi driver (or is he the butler?) asks Harker if he knows “Swing Low, Sweet Chariot” which they begin to sing, and in an odder moment, we’re cross cutting between them and the Serena / Mike Ranger BJ.  Once Swing Low end,s, we bring in Ravel’s Bolero as Serne stops sucking and jerks Ranger off onto her hand.

In the lab at the sanitarium, Van Helsing explains that Renfield is suffering under the spell of Nosferatu and he escapes from his cell and find Dracula’s coffin and with a cry of “Master, I’m here!” he lifts the lid to the strains of Strauss’ Also Sprach Zarathustra.  Jamie lays it on thick when he utters the immortal words: “I am Dracula; I bid you welcome! Listen to them… children of the night… what music they make! Mr. Renfield…”

Then a voice from nowhere: “Where are all the fags you promised?!!”

The next morning, Renfield shows up on the sanitium steps, ranting like a lunatic.  (Over the PA: “Paging Dr. Stoker – unruly patient in the violent ward..”)

There’s more plot and hammy acting, but it’s a pretty straight ahead vampire story.  Renfield is dragged out as he threatens Ms. Mina’s safety.

We cut to a coffin as a hand lifts the lid to the strains of Elgar’s Pomp and Circumstance.  Two of Dracula’s sexy maidens (Slavica and Renee Andre) emerge, and Slavica grabs a random patient (Mitch Morrill) and blows him and then rides him, but it’s not satisfying as she complains “I’ve been waiting 200 years for this?!?  Make it bigger!!”  We intercut some bunnies fucking too  and she pulls his dick out as he cums on her as and his pants.

Dracula shows up and Renfield makes a few puns about wanting to see Dracula come and then Dracula introduces himself as Dr. Seward’s new neighbor. Meanwhile, Irene is worried that Dr. Stoker (John Holmes) is too busy fucking the maid (Irene Best) on the pool table in the game room.  JH eats her out a little then starts to fuck her.  There’s some plot done away with in voiceover, and then Seward introduces Dracula to all of the other major characters.  Then we go back to the pool table where JH is fucking the maid doggie style and there’s some distinct “moist fucking” sounds on the soundtrack.  They seem to have mic’d this scene very well, or the foley guy had a field day with a melon…

Mozart fills the soundtrack and Serena challenges Dracula with a toast “To cry for the next to die” and he opines that there are worse things awaiting man than death.

Holmes is still banging the maid, making this one of the longer sequences in the movie, and it’s a sight to behold – his giant member plowing into her.  She’s got small tits with great nipples, and he takes great pleasure in dicking her slowly and we cut away to Mina in bed having girl talk with Lucy as Drac watches in through the window.  Lucy goes to the bathroom to have some water and pee and Drac enters the bathroom and puts Lucy under his spell.  He takes her nightgown off her left breast, and we cut away to Mina asleep.  (Also skipped via this cutaway, a golden shower where Drac pees on Lucy; when we cut back she’s clearly soaked with urine)  Drac jerks himself off onto her breast and then leaves her with a bloody bite on her tit.

Back to Holmes fucking the maid.  Man, Dr. Stoker just keeps on going!  He finally pulls out of her, she takes as much as she can in her mouth and her jerks off on her face leaving a nice facial.

The chauffeur goes into the stable and sees the coffins.  He lifts the lid on one and see Lucy in it. He yells for help and Swing Low is heard again as Dr. Bradley arrives at the casket ready to stab the beast within but instead starts to kiss Lucy’s dead body.  Kissing leads to cunnilingus with leads to fucking… Another modern no-no — necrophelia.  We briefly flashback to their garden tryst and he cums on her belly.

Nurse Lawson (Seka) finds Harker feeling sorry for himself at the cab, so she takes him inside and blows him. The chauffeur is fixing the car, so he’s stunned to find the car is a rockin and he looks in wide-eyed to see the action.  They manage to work through a few positions, missionary, reverse cowgirl and doggie.  There’s no pop shot; but there is more squishy sounds.

Meanwhile, Baby Jane (Nancy Hoffman) dressed and acting like an 8 year old girl runs away and into the arms of Slavica who says “Baby Jane, I want your clit!” and proceeds to eat her out for a bit, and end with some kissing.  More modern no-no — the intimation of underage sexing (even tho all participants are of legal age).

Dr. Seward watches their tryst out the window and discusses his worries about losing the sanitarium due to this vampire outbreak, so she calms him down by leading him down the road into no-no land again with some incest!  Kay strips down  and gently asks “Remember how you liked this?”  She purrs through this whole scene, and it’s probably the best scene in the movie. Its get weird when Seward says “This could have been your cock, but mother gave it to me.” and she whispers “You want to put it in me, Arthur?  You’d like to do that, wouldn’t you?” and then she’s blowing him.  God, Kay Parker is awesome.  She sucks for a while, then they go at it doggie and he jerks off all over his sister’s breasts as Leslie treats us to some of his famous dirty talk.

Dracula shows back up to give blood to help poor Mina for a visit, and Seward introduces him to Van Helsing.  This takes Drac back a little, “Van Helsing!  A name we know even in Transylvania.”   Sybil takes Drac to the blood taking room, and he confesses to being squeamish about giving blood, so he gazes into her eyes and she collapses on the table, allowing him to lift up her dress and dive in for a businessman’s lunch.  “When the Red Red Robin Comes Bobbin Along” plays on the soundtrack as he jerks off over her face, cumming on her tits.  (There was another pissing scene here, as she’s soaked, but we don’t see it; merely the aftermath.)

Seward yells at Nurse Lawson and Henry to go see Dr. Stoker who has also been bitten, on the cock.  He sweet talks her into letting him out and he grabs her and bites her neck and then forcibly takes rips her panties off and starts eating her out  as Renfield giggles manically from his cel. (We also hear patient Hitler and the cowboy singing during this scene.)  Blood covers Seka’s belly and JH starts fucking her as she screams, no so much in delight. He’s able to fuck her balls deep, and he gets a hand around her throat as he looks maniacally around. He rolls her over and takes her doggie style, and she doesn’t look very happy about it and the scene ends with some serious screaming as Beethoven’s Ninth plays under the scene.  It’s hard to look at this scene as arousing, but Seka’s tits look pretty great swaying around.  JH leaps off her and shoves his cock into her mouth, and he finally cums, painting a line of cum down her forehead, over her nose and down around her mouth.  Being a gentleman, he wipes away the bit that gathered in her eye.  She cleans him off for a while after, her breasts covered in blood.

The vampire story wraps itself up inside while Harker and Mina get it on in the garden.  As Harker is fingering Mina, a bat flies around and entrances her.  Finally Dracula appears on the scene and Harker realizes he’s fucked.  Dracula pulls Harker into his cape and we don’t see what happens, but it’s safe to assume he pisses on him, turning him into a creature of the night as well.  After Dracula vanquishes Harker, he makes sweet, sweet love to Mina in the conclusion to the scene we saw at the top of the movie.

There’s voiceover at the end that tells us that “Dracula has his new queen; she’s found eternal sexual passion with her master.. As for the rest of us mere  mortals, we must be content with our one night stands, c’est la vie.

Well, then!

Now, that’s a movie!  It had a strong plot, faithful to its inspiration (Dracula, not George Hamilton) and it had little funny bits interspersed (Pat Manning’s voiceovers, the PA announcements) and it had some “chills” in the sense that the old Universal horror movies had chills.

IMDB lists some trivia about the many many different versions this movie has been released in:

  • Softcore version eliminates shots of sexual penetration while the hardcore version does not include close-ups of the count biting female breasts and blood spurting from vampire mouths.
  • The 1980 UK cinema release ran 73 mins and was heavily cut to remove sexual footage. The 1986 Electric Video ran 72 mins and featured a pre-cut print (minus over 7 mins) which was then cut by a further 2 mins 26 secs by the BBFC. Among the cuts was a heavy edit to a sex scene which was performed during a Bela Lugosi radio broadcast of “The Doctor Prescribed Death”.
  • The film was re-cut and re-released in 1979 under the title Dracula Sucks(this is also the title the film was released under in Britain.
  • Original version was entitled “Dracula’s Bride” and ran 108 minutes long.
  • Released on video by VCS as Lust At First Bite, cut to 81 minutes.
  • Re-released in 1980 as Lust At First Bite, cut to 91 minutes.
  • Re-released in 1979 as Dracula Sucks,running 88 minutes,and re-edited.
  • Released in 1978 as Dracula’s Bride, running 110 minutes.

On the air, I gave the film an 8 or 9 out of 10 — but not necessarily for the sex.  This is a fun, silly Dracula movie in the vein of the old Universal movies by way of Hammer with some sex thrown in.  I don’t know if there’s any one scene that will make you want to whip it out outside of the context of this movie (my vote was the John Leslie / Kay Parker pairing) but I think this is a movie you can sit down with your favorite someone and watch and have it lead to some other stuff afterwards.

UPDATE 8/31/12: After listening to Seka’s segment on YouPorn, she set me straight – this was not her first movie (thanks, After Porn Ends!), but it was one of her first features, and she refers to the movie as “Dracula Sucks” tho it is nowadays known as LAFB.  As you can see from the IMDB alternate versions above, there’s been a shitload of titles, versions and cuts of this movie. mentions it a little bit.