Made it back to the office just in time tonight to speak with Nicki and Debi about The Devil In Miss Jones II by Henri Pachard. THIS MOVIE IS AN ALL-TIME CLASSIC. All directors should watch this movie like Welles watched Stagecoach before attempting to direct a movie.
The flick starts out with Miss Jones (Georgina Spelvin) in Hell, hitching a ride on Cyrano’s nose — but being porn his nose is penis shaped. Sex is not forbidden in Hell, but orgasm is. Of course, Miss Jones is on the brink, and the bells and buzzers start going off warning the Devil and his staff of the impending bliss…
Hell’s minions — large penis helmeted guards — come running and carry Miss Jones off to see the devil himself, Jack Wrangler.
Jack is awesome. He’s a golden boy all the way, but man, he can act. So can R Bolla as his advocate. (Get it, the Devil’s Advocate?)
There is a tremendous amount of banter in this movie, all of it fast and all of it funny. I was laughing quite a lot during the flick. Couples films of today should use this as a pattern.
Miss Jones makes the Devil cum (a flaming special effect that should make Pachard proud) and in return, she gets to go back to earth for an eternity of lust. The rest of the film is spent between earth and Hell as the Devil tries to keep tabs on Miss Jones, as he is falling in love with her.
Much is made of King Edward who abdicated the throne of England, and parallels are make between he and Lucifer.
Ron Jeremy (in a brief autofellating role), Sharon Mitchell and others have small roles throughout the film playing hell’s denizens. R Bolla stumbles upon Ron fucking some young lass, he stops as if caught, and says “Don’t worry, boss, I won’t cum…”
Meanwhile, back on earth, Justine is thrown into the body of high priced call girl Jacqueline Lorains. YUMMY!
Highlight of her scenes is a great scene between her and a meek john, Bobby Astyr. Playing an older version of the nerd perfected by Eddie Deezen (think Eugene in Grease) he is kinda embarrassed by his fetish.
“Spanking?” she asks. “No, Miss Roxanne…” “Golden Showers?” “Oh no, Miss Roxanne…” “Dress up?” He smiles. “You promise you won’t laugh?”
“I’m a professional. Just give my 500 bucks and tell me your fantasy”
“500 bucks!” shouts the Devil, remembering that back in 1982, 500 bucks actually was a chunk of change. Shit, it’s a chunk of change now.
Bobby Astyr comes out of the bathroom in his costume. He is dressed as the devil and has a Satan head french tickler on his cock. She is laughing hysterically, he is self-conscious, and the Devil is irked. A brilliant scene, worth the rental price alone.
The rest of the film has justine being popped from body to body, Private Benjamin (Joanna Storm – YUM!) (look for Pachard as her drill sergeant), tupperware saleslady, nun and finally back to call girl. All the while, she is watched by the smitten Jack Wrangler who is missing her more and more.
The movie ends with a great little scene between Joey Silvera and Jacqueline Lorains. All he wants is for her to say she loves him when he cums. It is an obsession of his, and she can’t quite bring herself to do it. She finally does, put then gets the feeling she’s being watched. She’s spooked and yells “Cyrano is that you?” Cyrano walks in, stoking himself, and then shooting flames as he cums.
“I abdicated” says Jack Wrangler. “I didn’t quit or resign, I abdicated.” Those lines are delivered with a truth rarely seen in adult films then or now.
There isn’t any crazy stuff in it — not even any anal — but it is a movie that both entertains and arouses.