Today on Spice Radio: Bikini Beach 1, 2 and 3 (1993)

Today at 2:30ish Eastern / 11:30ish Pacific on XM103 Spice Radio’s YouPorn, I’ll be talking with Christy and Ginger about Jim Enright‘s 1993 series, Bikini Beach.

In 1993, Jim Enright and Will Divide put a bunch of pornstars on a plane and took them to Cabo to drink beers and fuck while the cameras rolled.  The result was a three part series, Bikini Beach – Parts 1, 2 and 3.  This was the first movie where I fell in love with today’s guest, Rebecca Bardoux, so I figured I’d revisit the series to see how it held up.

Basically, the fun and frolic runs out of the series as it goes along.  The first installment is the best one, and while I suspect the fun and frolic lasted throughout their trip, we saw less and less of the fun — but just as much frolic — as we got to Part 3.

Part One

The first movie starts with a long set up, it’s about 12 minutes or so before we get to the first sex scene.  After the credit sequence (which is the same in all three films, tho they boys’ names are left out of the All-Girl Part 3) we are treated to footage of the cast and crew boarding the plane, then disembarking and driving out to their rental and finally they head off to the beach.  There’s lots of cute interactions and everyone seems to be enjoying each other’s company.

The first stop is Lovers Beach where most of the cast runs around naked while the crew guys work on their tans with their shorts on.  Lots of beer on hand.

Tiffany Mynx and Randy West find a secluded area of the beach and have a shag.  She lays out a blanket and Randy pins down the corners with their towels. Tiff’s breasts have such a great bounce to them as she’s romping around getting things ready.  She sits down, posing  and looking out at the surf.  Randy plans himself down next to her and they start to cuddle.  Cuddling leads to fondling.  Fondling leads to cocksucking.  It is no secret that Tiffany is a master cocksucker and her talents are well displayed here, even while working on Randy’s average prick.  She maintains a lot of eye contact with him, so it seems less like they’re performing than they’re just being spied upon, and that candor adds to the heat.  After some decent fucking, Randy blows a most un-Randy like cumshot onto her face (you can actually see the cum!) and she cleans him off.  Good stuff.

Next up, Crystal WilderJonathan Morgan and Crystal’s real life husband, Terry Thomas, find their own spot on the beach and Crystal gets double teamed (but not DP’d).  This seemed a bit more set up and perform-y, unlike the earlier Randy/Tiff pairing.  Crystal’s cock sucking was always dependent on a lot of spit — she was a trailblazer in this area — and she slather’s Jon’s cock as Terry eats her out and works a finger into her ass.  Jon jerks off near her face (he’s on his back which is always a cumshot fail position) and Terry jerks a sizable load off onto her ass.It’s a professional scene that hits the requisite marks, but doesn’t really rise above it.

Next up, Rebecca Bardoux is sunning herself and TT Boy sneaks over the rocks and surprises her.  She opens her eyes to see him above her and she lets a big smile play over her face.  He bends down to her, she throws her hat away and they make out.  She’s naked, he’s clothed.  She’s got John Lennon spec sunglasses on, and she smiles a lot.  God, I love smiling in porn.  He drops his shorts and he’s already at attention, so she makes sweet sweet mouth love to his organ. She doesn’t attempt to deep throat; choosing to focus on the head while her hand does the stroking.  She lies back and let’s him return the favor.  It’s tough to read her expression as one of pleasure or just merely tolerance for the position; but then she sits up and grinds her box into him and rocks her hips, so she seemed to be getting into it towards the end of the carpet munching.  Some more making out and he stands her up against the rock and takes her doggie style.  After some pounding, he turns her around on the rocks for some standing sex, and I couldn’t help but wonder how the rocks were digging into her back; but she took it like a trooper and when he’s about the cum, she drops to her knees and orders him to cum on her face.  He misses the first blast, but the rest hit their mark and she cleans him up.

Randy West takes Lacy Rose and Sierra to a hurricane swept abode and they make awkward small talk, with Randy repeating how the structure didn’t fare well in the hurricane and his not-as-clever-by-half joke  “Talk about a blow job.”   Awkwardness aside, Lacy and Sierra start to go at it on a broken section of wall while Randy just watches, touching himself.  Lacy’s fake books don’t look that great, especially when compared to Sierra’s all natural body.  The girls start teasing Randy and he invites himself over.  There’s a lot of laughing coming from Lacy as Sierra eats her and she’s snacking on Randy’s cock; but finally Randy comes up behind Sierra and hammers it home. Lots of porno screaming ensues and as Randy’s energetically fucking Lacy, he pulls out and jerks it on her belly as Sierra leans in to clean him off.

The last scene is subtitles “Party Time” and is back at the house.  Everyone has beers and Sierra is a little drunk and TT Boy is macking on her, and before you can think it, she’s blowing him.  This is an epic scene.  All the cast is around, but no one really is involved; they’re just cheering on the little drunk girl and the jackhammer that is TT Boy.  This is a long scene, about 20 minutes, and TT literally fucks her silly.   She pours Corona all over herself, she gets fucked around (I do mean, around) the table. TT Boy has her on her back, the table is slick with beer, sweat and love and he walks around the table, fucking her all the way. She goes nuts. NUTS!  N-V-T-S nuts! TT tries to get Rebecca and others in on the action, but they know its Sierra’s show. She ends it by taking TT’s load on her face. A decent facial.

So ends part one with a major bang, which was the AVN award winner for Best Sex Scene in 1993.  The Crystal scene and the first Sierra scenes are skippable, but the Tiffany, Rebecca and second Sierra scenes are keepers, with the Sierra scene being the grand champion.



This is subtitled “Slippery When Wet” and it starts with everyone on a fishing boat.  There’s a little “lifestyle” stuff with people catching tiny fish, but there’s not a ton of color.  Lacy Rose touches herself a bit during the opening, but finally, we settle on Summer Knight and Nick Rage who are playing with a hose, with Nick shooting streams of water into Summer’s girly bits.  They take their time playing with the hose — with Nick fingering her while she lets the stream play over her clit. This transitions into her sucking his cock for a little while, letting it “pop!” out of her mouth before he fucks her doggie style and slips his thumb up her ass.  She gets all porny-screaming at this point, having been mostly subdued up until this point.  He flips her over for the briefest of missionaries and then he cums on her face as she’s making goo-goo- eyes at the camera.  I always liked Summer, despite her bolt-ons, and she looks good here.

We pan over to see Alicia Rio and Tiffany Mynx enjoying each other’s company, and soon TT Boy is horning in on the action, having his way with Tiffany.  Alicia stays away from his manliness, letting Tiff do all the heavy lifting.  Alicia sucks Tiffany’s toes as she sits on Tiffany’s face, while TT Boy is pounding away on Tiffany’s nether regions.  There are some nice shots of Tiff’s eyes peeking out from under Alicia at this point. They move from missionary to standing doggie, and TT finally cums on Tiff’s ass.

Below deck, Lacy Rose is blowing Randy West, and shortly thereafter, Rebecca Bardoux gets in on the action, taking over the blowjob duties while Lacy site on Randy’s face.  Rebecca then rides Randy in a little more set up way while Lacy just sits back and plays with herself, occasionally slipping a hand in here and there.  Lacy gets taken doggie and Rebecca slides herself under them in an action that gets cut away from waaay too quickly.  Ostensibly, Randy cums on our girls’ faces, but there is absolutely no evidence of this, but the girls clean him off anyway.

Next up is some “play time” which is basically the girls waving and the boys showing off their underwater camera (something that will pay off in the third installment.)  There’s cheesy mexican synth music playing over these scenes, and it really does kind of take away from the “reality” that they tried to establish in the first episode.  It’s as if Enright just got bored… or maybe the crew was too drunk to come up with usable footage that far into the trip?  Who knows.

To round out the movie, Crystal WilderTT BoySierra and Jonathan Morgan find themselves on the beach near some sort of concrete structure and they pair off to go at it. TT and Crystal hop on an ATV to find a secluded spot for some fucking and they waste no time getting down to business.  More Mexican Guitar Music over their scene, which leads me to believe it was too windy to get any usable audio, so they’re doing the best they can with what they got.  They go at it standing doggie, and you can hear her moans kind of cut thru the audio mix, but not by much.  They end up in reverse cowgirl which shows off her nice lean body and her plastic tits, then she launches off him to catch his cumshot on her chin.

Finally, Sierra and Jonathan Morgan are playing in the surf; she’s naked, he’s in a suit, and stupid porn banter ensues.  I assume this is Morgan’s fault as he can’t help but be a little insincere.  There’s a lot of kissing on the beach blanket before Jon goes in for the fingerbango. They fuck doggie and he jerks it on her butthole as he implores her to “rub it in, yeah, rub it in!” in horrible stupid porn talk.  They run off into the surf as we dissolve to Crystal writing “The End” in the sand.

This was a weaker installment by far.  The Tiff scene probably gets the highest marks because she and Alicia play well off each other and she knows how to ride TT Boy.  Everything else was far less spontaneous than the first movie and a lot more porny.


This is an all-girl video, and the weakest of three in terms of  spontaneity and fun. These scenes are just set up and they play out as most porn scenes do.  Not a lot special here.

We start with Alicia Rio and Summer Knight in a pool, and we get to see the underwater camera in action here.  The girls enjoy themselves enough for it not to be a total washout (no pun intended)

Next, back on the boat, and Alicia RioSummer Knight and Lacy Rose are playing with fishing poles, and something that phallic can only lead to one thing, and the girls go at it.  Alicia massages Summer’s tits and there’s lot of kissing which is nice.  There’s a lot of tanning oil and Summer’s feet finds their way to Alicia’s and Lacy’s twats.  The girls grind against Summer’s feet and Alicia moves up to Summer’s knee and grinds all over it.  Pretty good stuff.

Better yet was Tiffany Mynx and Lacy Rose, going at it on the boat’s deck.  Tiffany just makes a meal out of Lacy and Lacy responds to every lick.  Tiffany bends Lacy over and pours beer down her crease and eats her out as Lacy just bucks her hips and really reacts.  I’m not the hugest mid-90s g/g fan, but this was pretty great; so much so the entire cast and crew is watching them go to town.

Crystal Wilder and Sierra take their place on the deck as the sun is setting and they enjoy their sapphic love.

Last scene takes place “Back Home” in Jim Enright‘s edit suite and Lacy Rose stops by.  She shows Jim the Hustler layout from the vacation and he shows her some footage which she masturbates to.  It’s a long scene and she uses a dildo towards the end of it.  She looks great in her white wifebeater, but once it comes off we’re back to the oddly placed saline sacks… but she seems to lose herself in the moment, so its forgiven.

This was the weakest entry of the three, having really only two scenes of note — the Alicia/Summer/Lacy threesome is tight and the Tiffany/Lacy scene is great.  The other scenes are OK, but nothing all that special, just generic mid-90s porn.

Today on Spice Radio: American Desire (1981)

Today is Legends Day on Spice Radio’s YouPorn and Veronica Hart will be on the show with Christy and Ginger, so I’ll be on the show beforehand (around 2:30 Eastern, 11:30 Pacific) talking about American Desire, a 1981 film by Lasse Braun.

East Coast Represent!

This tale of a couple stuck in a rut was shot in New York City, Long Island and Connecticut and it’s fun to see brief shots of the city in all its grungy glory.  (A marquee advertised “Air Plane” and we see the Twin Towers in the background as cars drive out of the city.)

The movie opens with a flaccid Bob (R. Bolla) and Sheila (Veronica Hart) watching an old kung-fu movie on TV.  They’re both lamenting that their sex life has, er, petered out.  They still love each other, but their torrid love affair has made way for comfortable evenings watching TV and sharing snacks, and it’s not a place either are particularly happy with.  They pull off a couple in their mid-30s convincingly, even tho Veronica was around 25 when she shot this, it helps that she’s paired with an actor actually in his mid-30s, the 34 year old R. Bolla. He thinks out loud that “maybe one person isn’t enough… or maybe one person is too many.”

The next morning, Sheila leaves a note for Bob saying she’s running to see her Dad for some advice and then running errands in the City. He throws the note off their back porch into the reeds below.

Next up, we see Sheila’s Dad (Jack Teague) thinking in his backyard with a notebook on his knee as his young partner (Mai Lin) looks on from upstairs, asking if he’s getting any work done.  He mentions he could use some inspiration, so she comes down to give him some. What follows is a pretty realistically shot sex scene, where there’s a lot of kissing and foreplay going on.  He has a thumb up inside her as she plays with his cock.  When she moves down to blow him, Braun makes sure to keep Jack’s face in the shot, instead of just focusing on the penetration.

In the midst of their tryst, Sheila shows up at the sliding glass door overlooking the patio and seems put out that she can’t talk to her Dad, as opposed to being completely and utterly freaked out by the fact that she walked in on her Dad and his special lady friend going at it right as he’s sliding himself inside for the first time.  This reaction is a bit odd.

The scene continues with some brief missionary and then Jack pulls out as Mai jerks him off.  Jack’s hips keep bucking the whole time which is a nice touch and adds some sensuality to the scene.  Sheila just takes off, not bothering to talk to her Dad after all.

Sheila’s Day Out (nice red T-Bird convertible!) continues with a trip to her grandfather’s abandoned house. She finds the front door locked, but goes around the back and lets herself in, only to be startled by George (George Payne), an academic who is poking around the house looking to see “what original architecture is left” because he’s “completing  a dissertation on comparative American literature and [Sheila’s Dad? Granddad?] is the best in that field.”  (Doesn’t make any more sense in the movie either.)  Sheila offers to give George her Dad’s number.

Meanwhile, back at the house, Bob calls an escort service and is excited to see Mistress Candice show up in her street clothes.  He’s all hot to trot, moving in to feel her up and lift up her shirt to look at her rack and she pushes him off, asking where the bathroom is, so she can get ready. He shows her the door and waits.  She comes out in full leather dominatrix outfit with a cat o’nine tails and proceeds to tease the hell out of him.  It’s a fun scene that is pretty hot, but there’s no sex in it.  We do get to see her spectacular rack, but her nipples only see pleasure from her own tongue – Bob is denied.  She leaves him with blue balls.  The scene is played for laughs.  At one point, Bob goes in for a kiss and she backs off.  He complains that he just wants to give her a kiss, since she has such a pretty mouth — and we cut to a closeup and her dental work leaves, well, a little something to be desired.

Sheila drives home to find Bob sleeping in bed, but finds leather straps around the house. She’s pissed about his whores, and he’s pissed they’re not fucking each other. He mentions again “Maybe one person isn’t enough.” and he wants her permission to step out since he doesn’t want to lie to her.  (There’s a confused nobility there.)  She laments that men can just ring up and order sex like room service, where it takes women months to figure out who to seduce, to do the seducing, etc.  Bob says she just needs to fuck someone already, that she’s wasting valuable time.  It’s an interesting philosophical debate.

George shows up at Sheila’s Dad’s house to drop off some of his writing, and instead finds himself being seduced by Mai.  She makes her move and drops to her knees.  George asks a sensible question – what happens if your old man walks in?  And she assures him that Dad Welles would be fine with it.  Mai has long nails which she uses to great effect on George’s shaft.  He gives himself over to it and grabs her head and starts guiding her strokes.

Cut to Dad and Sheila in the T-Bird on their way home.

Mai and George have moved to the bedroom and George goes down on her, then she rides him cowgirl and in a really spectacular move, launches herself off his cock and right onto his face in one leap.

Sheila approaches the house and hears the ruckus and sees George nailing Mai on the bed.  Her Dad approaches and she apologizes to him, since she gave George the address, and Dad, in full on creeper, says it’s more than fine and asks is she would like to join them.  She shakes him off and runs away.

There’s a drum beat playing on the soundtrack in synch with George’s pounding and it crescendos with his cumming on her belly.  Sheila’s Dad appears in the doorway, all grins.  Mai makes the introductions, George is horrified at the social faux pas, but Sheila’s Dad will have none of it.  “Nonsense!  If you made Mai Lin happy, then I’m happy!” and then Mai kisses George.  Kinda weird, kinda funny.

Bob is driving down the country roads in his (NJ plated – represent!)  Jeep when he comes across hitchhiker Lysa Thatcher who is looking for a place to camp out.  As they drive, she lights up a joint and he asks for a toke “I’m not an old man, you know!” and they head to a friend’s place where he has a barn/farmohouse that she can camp out in.

Meanwhile, Sheila is getting dressed up in a fancy hat and red lipstick.

At the barn, Lysa infantilizes herself further by riding on a very small wooden rocking horse. We see a shot of her between his legs, Mrs. Robinson style, and she mentions how much she loves his boots, and she crawls over to lick them, her ass cheeks hanging out of her cut-offs.  (Take *that* Daisy Duke!)  She works her way up his body and stands as he kisses her and moves his hands all over her.  She brushes him off and starts setting up her bunk, bending at the waist and driving us a little wild.  She finds a cat o’nine-tails and chain collar and asks if Bob knows about those things.  She hads him the cat o’nine tails, and he can’t possibly whip her.  She opens her shirt revealing her breasts and she asks to be hit, like a Daddy hits his little girl.    He starts to hit her a little harder and there’s a cut, so I assume the modern scissors have robbed us of a little more play… but at her urging, he gets his fingers all up in her (“Fuck it!  Fuck it with your fingers!”) and he brings her to orgasm.

And finally Bob gets his blowjob… and what a BJ it is.  He’s slapping her with his cock until finally they’re fucking doggie style, with her tits pressed into the bedsprings which we see from underneath.  Bob says “See what happens when you hitchhike!?” and she jerks him off onto her tongue.  So far, best scene in the movie.

Sheila heads back to Grandfather Welles’ house and a stranger (Roy Stuart) appears outside.  Without her knowing, he follows her into the house and confronts her.  He asks “Do you like my house?” and she says she can’t stay, that her husband is waiting for her, and he shoves his gloved hand into her crotch.  She protests as he starts to remove her jacket.  He asks “Don’t you like sex?” and she’s getting more upset.  “Tell me how you want to stay!” and she keeps saying no, and he rips open her shirt and throws her on the floor.  He rips open her bra and she’s yelling “Don’t touch me!” and he yells “Quiet!”  and as he is playing with her pussy thru her underwear, she gives up a little.  (Not one of the best messages, I suppose…)

He works a fingered finger into her doggie style and she squirms away.  She’s trying to get her clothes back on and run away.  She threatens to scream, and he tells her to scream “Who can hear you?” and she runs upstairs, but he’s too fast for her.

He lays her down on the bedroom floor, removes his gloves, opens his pants and lifts her head to his cock, and she blows him as she rubs her pussy for a second before he’s fucking her missionary.

As with these non-consensual scenes, it’s tough to really use them to get yourself off.

Construction worker Dave Ruby comes in the house and notices her clothes on the dining room floor and heads off to investigate.  Sheila comes downstairs naked and runs into him.  He asks if she’s all right, and she says “Never better.” and then makes moves on him.  He resists, “I’m a married man!  I’ve got a wife and two kids!” and she starts to go down on him.  The sexual prey becomes the predator?  As she blows him, he just keeps repeating that he can’t believe this is happening.  She takes him down to the root (not a difficult task, it seems) and she rips his T-Shirt off him.  He awkwardly falls to the floor, with his face landing in her lap.  There’s a way too brief long shot of him with his face buried in her bush while her head is going up and down a mile a minute on his cock.   Then, Rapist Roy comes back in for seconds and shoves his dick in her mouth.  There’s some brief continuity issues with positions, and then Dave shoves himself up her ass.  She pulls him out and jerks him off all over her pussy and belly, then Roy cums all over her face.  She’s a mess when its over.

Bob returns home with Lysa  in tow and Sheila is waiting for him on the bed.  Her experience at her grandfather’s house as sexually awakened her, and she tells him she did it, as if she was the cat who ate the canary. She chalked it up to acting out. So, maybe it wasn’t a rape, but a fantasy fulfillment?  She recounts the tale of her rape with breathless excitement as Bob attacks her, repeating the things she is describing.  (We see that Lysa Thatcher is overhearing the story.)  Bob is dominating a little bit as he demands to be told what happened.  Lysa drops trou and starts to play with herself outside their bedroom as she listens to Bob and Sheila fuck.  “Is this how he did it?  I gotta know!  It’s driving me crazy!”

They switch to missionary as she tells the Ballad of the Construction Worker,  “he was rough, but I wanted it rough! … I did it, and I don’t want to stop.  I don’t want to stop!” and she rides him reverse cowgirl.  Bob says he’s going to cum and she says no, that she wants to taste it. So she bounces off him and onto the bed where she jerks him climax, licking up every drop.

As music starts to play, Sheila find Lysa on the chair and they begin to make out.  They move to the bedroom where they can scissor each other. The girls make eye contact which is very hot; then as they 69, Bob appears, and he and Sheila share Lysa’s tail end and Sheila blows him like crazy.  Bob fucks Sheila a bit more and then the girls share a blow job to its conclusion.

Fun fact: Roy Stuart also wrote the music for the movie.

Wow wow wow wow wow.

I had never seen this movie, but since Veronica Hart was going to be on the show, I thought I should review a movie that featured her in a leading role, and boy, was this it!

She doesn’t get naked until more than halfway through the movie, but once she does, she’s an unstoppable force of nature.  She devours R. Bolla and Lysa Thatcher at the end.

The movie’s title is odd, “American Desire” as I am having a hard time defining the desire — is it merely sexual, or is it the desire to settle down and share your life with someone else?  Bob and Sheila start the movie as a couple and end the movie as a couple, and ostensibly, the shenanigans that happen in the middle are supposed to strengthen their resolve as a couple, even if it doesn’t involve monogamy.

It’s left a bit ambiguous (or perhaps I am just projecting) if Rapist Roy (and the construction worker) was a pre-arrangement or not.  I think I have trouble if it was a real rape, since it falls back on the trope that “all girls want it” and that’s not the greatest message to send, I think… nor does it work that well dramatically.  If it was pre-arranged, then it gives Sheila some power and we don’t have to watch that scene between the fingers covering our eyes.

I don’t remember Lasse Braun as an filmmaker, tho I do remember it being a big deal when he came back with a three picture for Sin City.  I didn’t get the historical significance at the time, tho Wikipedia does an OK job of filling in the gaps, as does

Fun fact – modern day director Axel Braun is Lasse’s son.

Today on Spice Radio: Taxi Girls (1979)

Today is Legends Day on Spice Radio’s YouPorn and Serena will be on the show with Christy and Ginger, so I’ll be on the show beforehand (around 2:30 Easter, 11:30 Pacific) talking about Taxi GirlsJourdan Alexander’s 1979 light sex romp.

The plot is breezy enough – mostly – cops round up the city’s streetwalkers, so they decide to open a taxi service as a cover.  They run into a bunch of roadblocks along the way, along with a rape at the end that really monkeys with the film’s tone.

There a shitload of people in this movie and all pop in and out.  This is Nancy Suiter‘s movie from top to bottom (and what a bottom!) and she has a lot of really really short sex scenes (the 16 scenes we list are less “scenes” and more “pairings”; some of the scenes are 60 seconds long; some are part of a larger sequence.)

At the top of movie under the credits, we see the town’s hookers being carted off to jail.  Once we’re in the cell, we take care of Scenes 1-3 in our breakdown which takes about 15 minutes. We see our heroine, Toni (Nancy Suiter), intently studying a newspaper while her cellmates –Amika GiortanoNancy SuiterPat ManningHillary Summers and Nancy Hoffman – work on getting the guard Mitch Morrill into the cell so they can fuck him and use his keys to escape.

With the cell door open, Stacy Goldman goes to the sergent’s desk and fucks a reluctant George Mitchell (under the desk!!) who has to deal with a ringing phone and a complaining old lady. The old lady is a riot.  They move into the cel where it’s easier to fuck.

Hillary Summers and Nancy Hoffman keep to themselves and engage in some fisting which you won’t find in the modern releases of the movie.  (I had to go back to the dubbed, Dutch subtitled VHS copy Peter sent me to see what was cut.)  They girls do some obscured 69 before Nancy Hoffman slips her hand into Hillary Summers.

Pat Manning does most of the heavy lifting with Mitch Morrill, tho she does allow Amika Giortano to get some licks in.  Nancy Suiter‘s involvement is limited to Mitch eating her out while she continues to study the newspaper.  Mitch eventually cums on Pat’s face, all while keeping a finger in Suiter’s twat.

A bunch of girls walk out of the cell (far more than had the sex) leaving the two cops and Nancy Suiter who is exclaiming “I got it!” as she’s reading the paper.  She discovered the ad for “Drivers TAXI MEN/WOMEN” and has found her calling.

We see Toni driving the cab and a fare asks her “What’s a nice girl like you doing driving a cab?” and she says with a leer “I do other things, too!) and we cut to him holding out a $100 bill and he undresses while making small talk about her stand-up comedy aspirations… “But just want people to like me for my head” and he says “I want to like you for your head too!” and she drops to her knees and takes him into her mouth… AND THEN WE’RE DONE!  (WHAT?!? There should be much more of a blowjob scene here, but alas, there is not… )

Back in the cab, two guys (Unknown Male 5505-D and Unknown Male 5505-E) are in the backseat discussing stocks and another (Unknown Male 5505-F) is in the front getting his limp cock jerked three or four times as they’re driving.

We cut to another passenger, Alan B. Colberg, who works a dildo into Toni’s twat as she’s driving. The overdubbed audio here is horrendous.  Most of the overdubbed levels are awful on the VCX VOD version I was reviewing at HotMovies; the Arrow levels are correct… so if you have pick one to watch, go with the Arrow version.

These scenes – 4-6 in our breakdown – take 90 seconds for the lot.

Toni sees some of the girls on the street and shows them the wad of cash she’s made in the afternoon.  Toni says she’s going to get some cabs, and the girls (Aubrey Nichols, Amika GiortanoSerena andStacy Goldman ) go over to see Teddy (Mike Ranger) , the taxi owner, to convince him to give all the girls jobs… and by convince, I mean have sex with.  We start with Toni blowing him and then Aubrey gives a little 69 action before Toni mounts him.  Aubrey stays on his face as Toni makes out with her and sucks her tits.  Serena plays with his balls and jerks him off (with a little lick at the end) to finish him off.  Amika and Stacy are there naked, but don’t really participate

Toni asks for 10 cabs, but Teddy says no deal, and they vow to run him out of business.

Toni and some more girls head to the bank to get a loan.  Candida Royalle asks the loan officer (Unknown Male 5505-G)  if they have a “lawaway loan — you know, lay now, pay later?” Some cute stilted, double-entendre dialogue (and a quick no-finish blowjob from Stacy Goldman) later and they adjourn to see his boss, John Seeman.

The usual four sex girls (Aubrey NicholsAmika GiortanoNancy Suiter and Stacy Goldman) take on John Seeman (wearing thick glasses and a silly chin beard.) Amika starts things off with a blowjob, then they lay him on the floor, but all he can think of is collateral. Aubrey rides him as Toni makes out with him. Aubrey jumps off and jerks him off to pop and Amika comes in and helps her clean him up.  Poor Stacy is left out like the runt unable to get to mama’s teat.  He signs off on the loan amid promises of being driven around anywhere.

The girls show up on a car lot and find a car to get the company started.  The car salesman, R.J. Reynolds, doesn’t really want to move on price, but the girls say “If you go down, so will we!” and the pack of girls leads him into the office, but our Gang of Four (Aubrey NicholsAmika GiortanoNancy Suiter and Stacy Goldman) tend to his needs.  First up, Aubrey blows him, taking him effortlessly to the root, and the other girls are on the couch and ask if he’s like to see a blond, brunette or a redhead, and he says he’d like to see them all — so Nancy and Stacy attack Amika; Nancy handling above the waist and Stacy tending to downstairs. R.J. really plays up the sex talk and eventually makes his way over to the couch (much to Aubrey’s dismay, she has a priceless “what I’d do wrong?” look on her face) where the throws a few humps into Amika before pulling out and blowing his load on her bush.

The girls chisel R.J. down to $2200, but in the next shot, we see a fleet of Red Ford Fairmonts pull up next to a cab line and steal a whole bunch of customers.

Next, we meet Harold his wife, and she’s fighting with her dog and he offers to take the dog for a walk.  He ties the dog to a fire hydrant as Toni’s cab pulls up, he jumps in asking to go “where my wife won’t see us” and off they go.

We see another guy riding in the cab and he flips on Little Orphan Dusty (also directed by Jourdan Alexander) where he briefly watches Rhonda Jo Petty blow Turk Lyon (RIP) before asking Toni for “the real thing” , but she demurs saying she has to be on stage in a half hour and he should catch one of her other girls.

We then cut to the comedy club where we see one of the comics finishing up, the emcee comes out and introduces Toni.  She opens with “Any of you recognize me?” and then launches into her routine.

Afterwards, we get some odd flashback scene of someone leaving Toni with an echoy voiceover and then a scene between her and John Holmes.  This is probably the most “conventional” scene in the movie as it takes place on a bed between only two people. He starts by going own on her and she grinds her hips into him as she cums, the he slides into missionary for awhile befre flippeing her over doggie style where we really get to see That Which Made Him Famous.  He finishes by climbing on her and sliding his dick into her mouth and then jerking off onto her tits.

Cut to Tommy’s taxi stand and there’s a revolt among his drivers. Seems the girls are taking their business and he has to lay them all off.  This pisses the drivers off and they vow to exact revenge.

Meanwhile, the girls are still doing their thing, driving around a corporate bigwig while he’s being blown by two girls in the backseat.  It’s a pretty good BJ scene.

Next cab fare has a guy complaining about the sex doll he has to fuck — he only has 20 bucks after all… so he fucks the sex doll.  More funny than hot.

Back at the comedy club, John Holmes is waiting for Toni, and we get a glimpse of Svetlana doing part of her set on stage.

At the end of a dark street, Bud Wise and Jamie Gillis kidnap Serena and take her to a warehouse to rape her so hard, her ass “will be too red to sit down in a cab.”  Gillis fucks her from behind as Bud Wise shoves his cock down her throat.  There’s a lot of yelling, and more guys show up and eventually they drag Toni in with them.

Holmes takes a competing cab ride home  and gets wind of something going from the other driver.  Once home, Holmes calls into the girls’ dispatch and has everyone meet him up at the address he heard in Tommy’s guy’s cab.

“It’s not so bad is it?” Jamie purrs in Toni’s ear.  She also manages to capture the dead eye look as he’s fucking her.  Way Creepy.

Finally, the guys cum on Serena and Toni’s faces, as the other girls come in carrying crowbars and billy clubs , and they attack the male cabbies, beating them senseless and rescuing their own.  Toni has her wits about her, but Serena is all fuck-drunk, looking like she’s been through a war.

Toni’s apparently got herself arrested and she’s getting dressed for court.  She promises Holmes that she’s done.

She gets to court, and the judge is Harold! The guy with the dog!  The defendant pleads guilty, but the judge insists on seeing her in his chamber, where he quickly disrobes and has her “serve her sentence” (I mean blow him.)

Like most blowjobs in this movie, this one lasts 20 seconds and – unlike the other  BJs – is interrupted by the “THE END” title card.

[UPDATE: Well, that was … something.  I was dropped into the middle of an Abbott and Costello routine with a heaping dose of Marx Brothers. Lots of confused wordplay, gender mix-ups, and hysterical misreading of the review.]


Today on Spice Radio: Trashy Lady (1985)

Today on Spice Radio YouPort (XM103 at 2:30 PM Eastern / 11:30 AM Pacific) I’ll be talking with Ginger and Christy about the 1985 movie Trashy Lady starring Ginger and their guest, Cara Lott.

The movie starts out with 1920s gangster Dutch Siegel is (Harry Reems) on the phone and his moll, Cara, is complaining that he spends too much time working, and not enough time taking care of her. .. so he takes care of her.

He starts out eating her out and then she returns the favor.  I’m a big fan of hands-free cock sucking and she starts by pulling his boxers down and then just taking his floppy member right in her mouth.  They bang missionary for a while and then he flips her over for some doggie and he cums on her ass.  She looks pretty good here, all natural and into her partner.

Afterwards, they go to a speakeasy and Dutch wants to leave, but Cara doesn’t; and she ends up leaving him for good.  (“Dutch?  Fuck off!”)  Dutch becomes enamored with the cigarette girl (Ginger Lynn) and asks Tony, the owner (Steve Drake) about her.  Tony plays dumb, but Dutch says everyone knows he fucks the new girls before putting them out on the floor.

So we flashback to Tony fucking Kitty standing doggie style.  She’s not enjoying herself, but she needs the job, so she just takes it.  Ginger has most of her clothes on, but she’s got a great all-in-one garter/stocking set on that shows off her ass. This is not a sexually exciting screen as Kitty is all but waiting for Tony to finish up; and he does by cumming a bit on her ass.

Dutch calls Kitty over and asks her to be his gal.

Next, we see Dutch’s car pull up to a curb outside his office and he gets out and sees newsie Tom Byron.  He flips him a quarter to watch the car as he goes inside.

A quick note about the art direction – really top notch.  They shoot in decent locations that look the period, and they rented the right cars.  Costumes are paid attention to and are period appropriate.

Dutch sends for his rival, Big Louie’s (Hershel Savage) moll, Rita (Amber Lynn), and she’s got tough talk for him.  Dutch wants Rita to help make Kitty less classy.  “What a guy like me needs, is a Trashy Lady, just like you!” and he plies her with some jewelry.  Since Big Louie is in the slammer, she takes the deal. To show her appreciation, she blows him.  They’re both clothed throughout the scene, and she asks him to cum on her face, and really — how can he not oblige?  (For a second it looked as if she was going to be able to make him cum; but at the last minute, he had to finish himself off.)

Rita says she needs a guy to help make Kitty trashy, and right at that moment, he hears Tommy yelling from downstairs.  We cut to Tommy laid on a bed with Amber and Ginger on either side of him.  Amber starts sucking his dick, giving Ginger instruction along the way. Ginger asks questions along the way, and really works his dick over, taking it all the way down.  Amber paints her nails hooker red while Ginger goes to town.

Ginger is all smiles and just looks great, but once she gets him hard, Amber pushes her away and sits on Tommy’s cock.  Ginger positions herself around to get a good vantage.  Amber looks really great as she rides away. Then its Ginger’s turn and she’s all smiles and far more into the sex than she was with Steve.  She bucks into him and when he’s about to cum, Amber reaches her newly polished nails around and jerks him off onto Ginger’s ass.  Ginger asks how she did, and Amber makes a date for more practice the next day.

Next up, Big Louie is in jail, visited by Al (J. Massey) his lawyer(?) who tells Louie about Rita’s deal with Dutch.  Louie, as you might imagine, is none too pleased.  Dutch leaves and sees Tommy on the way out, throwing him a “double sawbuck” for his troubles.

Next, Dutch heads to the local gym where he’s ensuring that his fighter (Francois Papilion) is ready to take a dive that night.  His trainer (Marc Wallice) assures Dutch he will.  Meanwhile, a groupie (Cheri Janvier) is complaining about the lack of sex and Dutch suggests she do something about it — so she DP’s Francois and Marc.  They bang for a while then Marc pulls out of her ass to pop his load, then Francois pulls out of her pussy to cum on her ass.

As Kitty is practicing her swear words, she catches the attention of maid, Bunny Bleu.  Bunny wastes no time sucking Ginger’s tits and then moving down between her legs.  Then it’s Ginger’s turn to eat out, and Bunny hikes up her maid uniform and Ginger gets to work.  Bunny offers her pointers as she goes along, but it’s clear that Ginger is a quick learner.

Rita goes to visit Louie in jail, and he lets her know that he knows of her deal with Dutch… but he misses her and as he tells her the things he’s going to do to her when he gets out, we get a fantasy pairing between the two in the visiting room.  He eats her, she sucks him off, then he gives her a solid fucking on the table.  After some in-and-out, he pulls his cock out and lays it across her bush as he pulls off a patented John Leslie no hands cum shot…

Dutch, a mechanic and Dutch’s bodyguard (Rick Savage) are in an alcohol warehouse when one of Louie’s henchmen opens fire with a tommy gun.

Ginger is in the bath and calls to Bunny who is making the bed while Rick looks on.  Ginger’s being bitchy, er trashy, and Bunny isn’t having any of it.  Rick commiserates about what a bitch Ginger is being and he makes a move on Bunny which ends with her sucking his dick… and interrupting it to answer to Ginger in the tub.

I’ve always found Bunny to be very attractive, but she’s been slightly tarnished by Jerry Butler who compared her to a blow-up “Bobo the Clown” inflatable toy.

She gets up on the edge of the bed, and Rick climbs under to eat her out from behind.  He gets his thumb up in her and she lowers herself down on it.  Soon enough, he takes his thumb out, lays her on the chaise and throws a hump into her and blows a good load on her bush.

Finally, Dutch visits Louie in jail and confronts him about trying to rub him out take over the bootlegging operation.  Dutch says he was pissed about Rita going over to Dutch’s every day, and Dutch explains the score.

Soon thereafter, Louie is out of jail and at the “3rd Annual Brotherhood Convention” we get the big reveal of Kitty, in a gorgeous white satin dress.  She curses a bit and Dutch is enamored with his Trashy Lady.

My colleague, Jamie, over at his site, Videotramp, had this to say about the movie:

Trashy Lady director, Steve Scott, started out working in the publicity department at Universal Studios in the late 1960′s, before venturing into porn in 1975 on a dare. Within the next ten years, Scott churned out roughly twenty-four gay porn films. Some of them were dogs, but most would go on to become gay classics, including Track Meet, A Married Man and A Few Good Men. In 1985, he began experimenting with ‘straight’ porn, shooting three shot-on-film titles for Masterpiece Video (a now-defunct division of 4-Play Video). All three of the films featured an upncoming starlet named Ginger Lynn. Interestingly, their three collaborations, especially Trashy Lady, are still being discussed by porn fans even today ” a testament to their significance. The years truly have been kind to Trashy Lady, which has gone on to become a legitimate adult film classic, often noted by Ginger Lynn aficionados as one of her finest films.

The film was out of print for a long time, but it has since found a new audience on DVD and VOD.  It’s definitely worth a look; pay attention to the Amber/Ginger/Tommy scene with honorable mentions going to the two Bunny Bleu scenes.

Site Tweak: Number of Partners

We were reading Ed PowersFacebook page (don’t judge us!) and someone was trying to determine how many girls Ed had been with, and they had to count the number of performers on his scene pairing list.

That seemed like a silly task to make someone do, so we’ve now added a counter at the end of each section, telling you how many performers are in that section… so here we go.

Ed’s been 1416 gals, as far as we know.  The data is glommed from our scene breakdown data which is incomplete, but what’s there is generally pretty reliable… so we’ll almost always understate the numbers; but never by a predictable amount.